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Mommy dearest cut off my hand

Contributed by Desolated_Denial on Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 01:02:42 PM in AEST
Topic: dedicatedpoems



Talking back
beat me down
All alone
in your gown
Going down
down again
Take me back
to the end

I want to go
Get off my mind
I want to show
I don't have time
I don't know
You don't care
All alone
Piggy fair


Wake up to you're loving damnation
All wrapped up with no where to go
Wake me up to my sanity salvation
Tell me what you want to know


Looking back
Hour glass
Time is bleak
You're so weak
With a cause
Or your claws
I don't mind
I have some time

Chasing me
I'm willing
Never need
the running scene
It's what you guess
beat to impress
I don't care
Your plastic hair


Put me, put me, put me in your chair
kill me, kill me, kill me on your stage
Lull me, lull me, lull me, with your stare
I don't want the time ...






Copyright © Desolated_Denial ... [ 2005-10-07 13:02:42]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Mommy dearest cut off my hand (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 04:32:47 PM AEST
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Are you just choosing words because they rhyme? because your not making any sense boyo


Re: Mommy dearest cut off my hand (User Rating: 1 )
by judasman on Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 04:51:08 PM AEST
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you don't care
all alone
piggy fair

cool!

good write a bit obscure but nevertheless good


Re: Mommy dearest cut off my hand (User Rating: 1 )
by Desolated_Denial on Friday, 7th October 2005 @ 06:07:43 PM AEST
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Thank you for your constructive critizism... and no, i'm not choosing them because they rhyme ... look past face value. If you look past superficial rhymes, then you would see the meaning.

Thank you for your comments, though. I truly am grateful.


Re: Mommy dearest cut off my hand (User Rating: 1 )
by grim6669 on Sunday, 9th October 2005 @ 12:14:47 PM AEST
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i really like this one.....i love the way you write and the words you choose.....don't mind what the others say about the words they say you're making up....even if you are just making them up, i still love your poetry.
keep up the good work.
grim6669
amber


Re: Mommy dearest cut off my hand (User Rating: 1 )
by Minus_Blindfold on Thursday, 27th October 2005 @ 07:33:13 PM AEST
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Go Lili, go Lili, go, go, go Lili....




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