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my lullaby
Contributed by
SmileSkinDeep
on
Friday, 18th November 2005 @ 02:06:57 PM in AEST
Topic:
SongLyrics
|
sweet sweet lullaby
put me to sleep
give me some joy i can keep
wrap your arms around me
dry my tears
tell me all the thing i want to hear
as the rains falls
so do my tears
just a memory in my place
just my frears
sweet sweet lullaby
tuck me in
say a prayr
forgive my sins
tell me everything will be alright
then give me a hug good night
Copyright ©
SmileSkinDeep
... [
2005-11-18 14:06:57]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: my lullaby
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Friday, 18th November 2005 @ 07:48:29 PM AEST
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This is nice. Simple but emotive, and you showed good use of line breaks.
There are a few typos, and I think some puncuation would be nice, but other than that, not at all bad.
Andrew |
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