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…Beautiful Silver…
Contributed by
SensitiveSoAbused
on
Tuesday, 27th December 2005 @ 10:28:17 PM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
An imagination like the pulling of an oar
In a thrashing sea with hopes of reaching tangibility
Always dreaming with my fingers playing
of you and always seems an ideal of cherried thoughts,
dancing blue moonlight of an unreachable seraphim,
led on by grey mist, swirlings of thoughts
of a deeply purple disallowed
impossibility.
Is it legitimate to wonder?
To doubt with fleeting eyes and restless movements?
Lose hope in a torrential downpour.
Do not fool anyone with a merry hat of childish colours
impossible and too far to run
by train and run over on the tracks.
Too much history not recorded in peeling texts.
My ears are sweaty. Theyve never been but.
And Ive never experienced it outside my own head.
Imagining eternity
forever
and always.
Blame me if Ive got dark eyes.
Leave me halflit behind if I cant stand
this fleeting teasing.
Grasp at nothing like me
To find scarred frustration.
Anguish only rivalled by rainstorms.
Beautiful silver washing over me
though Im dead.
[2005-12-26 09:40:48]
Copyright ©
SensitiveSoAbused
... [
2005-12-27 22:28:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: …Beautiful Silver…
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Wednesday, 28th December 2005 @ 07:38:30 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is a well-executed and powerful piece. I like the last stanza especially. Keep it up!
Andrew |
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Re: …Beautiful Silver…
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 28th December 2005 @ 10:23:18 AM AEST
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a Message)
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claps!!!!! very nicely written. I wouldn't be surprised to see this published somewhere.
Great images and well thought out concepts.
I like this enough to mention it in the Best Poem of the Day Forum!!
Excellent work! |
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Re: …Beautiful Silver…
(User Rating: 1 )
by CucuaVanda on
Wednesday, 28th December 2005 @ 12:35:30 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I liked the images this brought forth in my mind, nice piece! :)
~Dove's Promise~ |
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Re: …Beautiful Silver…
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 28th December 2005 @ 01:12:50 PM AEST
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This is a sensational write! ! ! I hope that the "beautiful silver washing over" you resurrects new life, new hope, and new happiness for you.
Take care and thanks for sharing this.
Tim
:-)
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Re: …Beautiful Silver…
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Thursday, 29th December 2005 @ 01:06:39 AM AEST
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I agree with Andrew and I must admit I was
drawn in by the first line "imagination like the
pulling of an oar" what a line that was and
poetic brilliance was displayed throughout
this magnificent piece. I need to clear aside
the beer bottles that litter your floor so I can
find a place to sit as you tutor me and instruct
me how you write like this... I'll shut up and go
read this again.
Bobo (Joel) |
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