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Take It Out Of Me
Contributed by
Evening_Star
on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 12:51:30 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I can see you staring at me
With a strange look in your eyes
One Ive never seen before
Quietly I back away from you
Never taking my eyes from you
Slowly I see your hand take something
From behind your back
In the faint lighting I see
A glinting cold steel knife
Faster I back away from you
Trying to remain calm
When finally fear overcomes me
I turn and run heading for the door
I turn my head to see how close you are to me
When I see you trip and begin to fall forward
I hear a sickening thud
I stop running and turn to look back
Youre laying on the ground with the knife
In your chest
I walk back to where you lay
I can hear you trying to gasp for air
And can see the blood beginning to pool
Carefully, I roll you roll you over
And can see your hand clasped
Around the handle of the knife
Quietly, you utter the words Take It Out Of Me
I wrap my hand around yours and with my other hand
Apply gentle firm pressure to your chest
Slowly I begin to pull the knife out
I can feel it sliding through your flesh
Seconds after I hear a guttural sound and
See you lurch forward
A bubble of blood pours out of your mouth
Your head smacks the ground
And I can see your eyes roll to the back of your head
I check for a pulse
But youre already
Dead
Copyright ©
Evening_Star
... [
2006-01-10 00:51:30]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Take It Out Of Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by fearlessleader7 on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 12:59:47 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Wow...that was amazing! Nice and dark! I love this part:
"Carefully, I roll you roll you over
And can see your hand clasped
Around the handle of the knife
Quietly, you utter the words 'Take It Out Of Me'"
Great job! |
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Re: Take It Out Of Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by slayer_015 on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 01:06:01 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Now that's right down my alley.I know a little bit about dark poetry and that my friend was dark.All nonsense aside,it was a beautiful poem,and I pray it really didn't happen anywhere but in your mind.It was beautiful though.
Brian |
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Re: Take It Out Of Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by cheralex on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 02:43:24 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Wow, I wasn't sure I'd like this type of poetry but that kept me enthralled to the very end! |
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Re: Take It Out Of Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jackee_line on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 06:31:20 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Fascinating write, well done |
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Re: Take It Out Of Me
(User Rating: 1 )
by Aquaelius on
Tuesday, 10th January 2006 @ 09:05:20 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I'm creeped out... someone trying to kill me... "You got what I deserved!" is what I would say, maybe stab them a few more times.
Very well written, definitely made me want to see what happened in that dark way. Thanks for sharing.
Aq. |
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