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Before you came into my life
Contributed by
merlin
on
Monday, 17th April 2006 @ 10:07:48 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Before You Came Into My Life
The world it had no colour
the sky was never blue
the clouds were dark & grey
people never laughed
there was always so much pain
Trees were never green in summer
flowers never came into bloom
birds they never sang their songs
the sun didn't shine at all
never bright was the moon
the sea never ebbed & flowed
or came rushing to the shore
somehow not so blue
the colour never changed
some how it just knew
now that you are in my life
the world's a nicer place
the sun now shines
the moon is now bright
seems your love has made things right.
Copyright ©
merlin
... [
2006-04-17 10:07:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Before you came into my life
(User Rating: 1 )
by TiaXander on
Monday, 17th April 2006 @ 04:29:00 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Merlin
are you sure this is your first time writing poetry? Heheheh course you are but a true poet writes what he/she knows. You did more than that you're poem made me realize that I to felt this way and have long forgotten....
Tia
P.S. WELCOME |
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Re: Before you came into my life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 17th April 2006 @ 05:09:13 PM AEST
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When we have the inspiration and motivation, we write the best we can without noticing.
I like how you write it.
And yeah, after you are with someone you like, everything changes, you feel as if you are in another world.
:D |
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Re: Before you came into my life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 17th April 2006 @ 06:29:30 PM AEST
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| Well you did a wonderful job on this. I can totally relate b/c i was the same way until I met the love of my life. |
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Re: Before you came into my life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Tuesday, 18th April 2006 @ 05:54:07 AM AEST
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Hey, this is good work, Merlin. Fine username, by the way.
The first stanzas were painted quite well, descriptive and artistic. I like, as well, that the last stanza, in the process of summing it up, doesn't linger too long in the actual relationship, thus letting the imagery that went before it do its job undiminished. That's a good strategy to remember.
Seems the muses have given you a good first piece, and it's certainly a subject more can come from, so keep at it, eh? Maybe this was beginner's luck, but methinks you could aquire some fine skill given time as well.
Slàinte.
Andrew |
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