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The Mind's a Crazy Thing
Contributed by
Jeremy_B
on
Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 08:50:22 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Sinfully torn between a symphony born of melodic thoughts officially sworn to scheme, sinful needs thorn episodic plots initially formed by simple beings, worn from periodic haunts viscously scorned by simple means born of psychotic taunts, neurotic wants, and chaotic flaunts, of mans mental instability A detrimental disability of cranial fabrics & general sensibility
: pen plops down with a thud :
The mind's a funny thing... ...so I humbly sing in tune w/ sorrow, consumed... ...by a hollow heart and express with pen inked... ...in a shallow art
my last impart pressed... ...forever in text, with the brilliance of a mind... ...gone vexed, my minds gone & all that's left... ...is an empty vessel,
spilt booze & these lines I've left!
[ The stench of a liver marinated through a life of drink escapes the lips on the tail end of each breath in sync with each word he speaks thru his lonesome sorrows alone w/ a bottle half smashed off the contents in glass a liquid inspiration to bask in his desperation full flask were the thirst for life is quenched by the sands of time swallowed by brilliant minds scribed on pages of fine literature, described by visuals defined by the residual effects of absinthe while absent from original context melting facets of integrity like faucets of aboriginal text flowing forth like ice water tapped from creative veins of those who gorge on the flesh of metaphor and pain in meadows born of rain where words flower off two-lips & tulips shower off moonlit backdrops inked in new script a solemn world of bottled booze in smoke filled rooms where chasing dragons spark a dance with fire & muse ]
Burdened as the carpenter ...of written word, in stammered verse, I'm ...hammered first, & damned by an aching thirst ...like the damned, who awaken first under ... an ancient curse, starved for blood in a world ...of bleeding arts, the drinking starts at the jugular ...of beating hearts, like verbal darts I play sharp ...games on cork, & hit bulls eyes w/ points ...well forked,
in roads paved by words ...I've posed, as an innovator of prose ...& proposed, to many a coke bottle shape ...now I tremble, & shake until I consume ...my fill, of the venoms I snake ...milked from the, fangs of a poisonous make ...my strike of pen is likened to a strike from ten ...Saw Scaled Vipers, lying in wait, dying to take ...the life of men,
[ A Farewell to Arms? When a double barrel death barrows thru thoughts & shattered grey matter splatters on clocks just to be mindful of a time before shock therapy primmed the shells that eventually blew this mind in a cabin of logs rabid like dogs his mouth foamed as he violently twitched in a pool of blood as his shotgun crashed on the cold floor the blast tore thru his cranial plate & wiped his slate clean it's morbidly ironic this iconic symbol's farewell rang out by armed means, the death of a true master craftsman fashioned by suicide as his passion to write said good night and the gleam in his minds eye burned out like candles left in the wind, creative juices dried out, theres no doubt it's curtain call, time to put an end to all that hurts him raw so he pours one last drink past quivering lips on a face soon to be ripped off & puts the glass down by the last page of the memoirs he's passed down... ]
: thunderous blast :
The mind's a funny thing... ...so I humbly sing in tune w/ sorrow, consumed... ...by a hollow heart and express with pen inked... ...in a shallow art
my last impart pressed... ...forever in text, with the brilliance of a mind... ...gone vexed, my minds gone & all that's left... ...is an empty vessel,
spilt booze & these lines I've left!
Copyright ©
Jeremy_B
... [
2006-05-16 20:50:22] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Mind's a Crazy Thing
(User Rating: 1 ) by wizard on
Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 09:06:14 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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wow...that was awesome!
nicely done.
wiz |
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Re: The Mind's a Crazy Thing
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Tuesday, 16th May 2006 @ 09:54:47 PM AEST (User
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::applauds:: i cant stand hemmingway, but oddly enough your poem wasnt a complete turnoff because of the topic. maybe i just dont like him because i can identify with him. i would say this was a bit longwinded (which is a huge contradiction to the style of hemmingway) you had some nice allusions in this as well. you had some good originality running throughout this. also interesting formats and such. my english teacher once brought up an interesting point, "why in the world would someone leave a person in his state of mind in a cabin filled with guns (knowingly!!)?" i do much prefer fitzgerald to hemmingway though, hemmingways arch nemesis =]. though i havent read much of fitzgerald, poor lost generation. hardly anyone had a happy ending... |
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