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14 year old prostitute
Contributed by
wolf_tamer
on
Monday, 12th June 2006 @ 05:13:06 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
~6-12-06~
with no home
and no food to eat
this poor little girl
becomes some mans' treat
every night
this was how it went
some guys sex toy
always for rent
she hated this rutine
but she needed the food
she would dance on the tables
and was most often nude
soon she had money
and a reputation to boot
she was known around town
as a 14 year old prostitute
thes went on for a while
but it never seemed right
this poor little girl
who pleasured men all night
then one night she decided
that this needed to end
she went to a building
and up the stairs she did ascend
at the top of the stairs
she climbed to the top
she jumped out the window
and made all her problems stop.
Copyright ©
wolf_tamer
... [
2006-06-12 17:13:06]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: 14 year old prostitute
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 12th June 2006 @ 05:52:42 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This is a captivating portrayal of desperation leading to desperation leading to desperation and death. You're so right to put it in Sad Poetry.
Welcome to YPDC. You'll find a lot of supportive folks and some very fantastic poets here. Make sure ya reads and comments 3 to 1 post and git some more work on the site. You can easily fit in.
Oh you asked fer criticism? Watch yer spellin' an apostrophe placement. Tends t' bump the flowin' of the poem in readin'. Only really works in half stupid talk like cowboy, when serious is a four letter word, if ya know what I mean.
Again welcome!
wabl
KenMoore
cowboy |
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Re: 14 year old prostitute
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Monday, 12th June 2006 @ 06:25:23 PM AEST
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a Message)
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a sad write indeed...unfortunately, not such a rare occurrence in our world.
wiz |
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Re: 14 year old prostitute
(User Rating: 1 )
by bronzen on
Monday, 12th June 2006 @ 06:27:05 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| powerful portrayal of our youth good write |
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Re: 14 year old prostitute
(User Rating: 1 )
by artjunkiekyle on
Monday, 19th June 2006 @ 11:42:41 PM AEST
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a Message)
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There is just something about the way that you write that I find absolutely intriguing. Your title selections are definitely unique! Keep writing.
Peace, love, and bubblegum!!! |
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Re: 14 year old prostitute
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ruby2sdy on
Sunday, 25th June 2006 @ 08:53:37 AM AEST
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a Message)
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This is such a sad tale, but as others have said, very true. You write well, this poem has a good rhythm and rhyme to it, nice piece of work!
2sdyx |
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Re: 14 year old prostitute
(User Rating: 1 )
by DharmaBum on
Monday, 11th October 2010 @ 05:24:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Can't get a more hooking title then that! Very dark writing but ultimately it is true, not everything can be happy. Good rhyme scheme, it was pleasant sounding but disturbing content. I enjoyed thanks!
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