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Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
Contributed by
Elizabeth_Dandy
on
Wednesday, 21st June 2006 @ 07:06:27 AM in AEST
Topic:
war
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Yellow Ribbons fade so fast
Alike acacia,- yellow lush,-
So zest and drive does neither last,
But wilts upon the bush.
Young brave freedom warrior
Returning from the battle field,
Will he get the due succor
For battling and blood spilled?
Funds are allocated, but
For what? for whom? for who?-
Some programs stay and some are cut,
Remember? dja vu?
Will these funds the veteran bless,
To prove due gratitude,
Or will his fate be homelessness,
And lack of care and food.
Post-traumatic stress disorder,-
A label proximate,-
As justice for the warrior
Who sleeps within a crate.
A Soldier suffers poverty,
Kenosis tis supreme,
Obedient until death is he
With the reward so slim.
Forgotten quick his martyrdom,
And how he hurt and bled,
While chic country men at home
Get for the Opera clad.
Yet hordes come with impunity
Invading freedoms land,
While soldiers fight for liberty
Fatigued, exhausted, spent.
Invasion from a borders south
Make sacrifices nil,
And vain and pointless are the blows
Sustained in fight and kill.
Millions come by day and night,
Just laws exist no more,
But none stands up to set things right
As they invade our shore!
But warriors stare in rainy mist
Or shovel snow, - who cares?
Let dja vu ! - psychiatrists
Attend the vacant stares.
Soldiers are obedient
Follow orders, risk their lives,
Their land and people to defend
In grueling battle strife.
Self forgetting bravery,
Is the soldiers only crown,
So his people may live free
Hes willing to go down.
Heaped on warriors is abuse
By fat cat Senators,
And by elements obtuse
Reproaching warriors.
Blame the brave Marine, reproach
Blame the brave marine,
Warriors blamed by the cockroach
Or pundits asinine.
Lord be with the soldiers please
When the roll call bugle sounds
Or at the last bullets whiz,
Let them hear your Welcome call.
Yellow ribbons tied around
The poles the bush, the tree,
Fall far too soon upon the ground
With no indemnity.
He has returned, came home, sweet home,
The one that fought and bled ,
But all he loved and had is gone,-
Salute the warrior Vet!
Elizabeth Dandy
Publ. in Volume 2 of Poetry by E.D The Vantage Press, N.Y.
Copyright ©
Elizabeth_Dandy
... [
2006-06-21 07:06:27]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Wednesday, 21st June 2006 @ 10:58:44 AM AEST
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Most touching and beautiful tribute I've ever read ED. Oh Dear God in Heaven please look over the young men and women overseas and even here in the States. Give them the strength and the courage and the fortitude to obey their orders in the face of death.
I especially liked the part ED about the men who so leisurely sit behind their desks in Gov't offices and demand this and that........What right have they, where is their support? Why? Why? Why? Must older men send young men to die, why don't they go themselves? If they did, there would be alot of wars never started~!
Warm love to you and your marvelous tribute.
ConSue |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 21st June 2006 @ 05:59:14 PM AEST
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You had a meter running at the start.
YELlow RIBbons FADE so, FAST
Alike ACacIA,-yelLOW lush
In any case, the stress on "lush" threw out the meter. You did have a syllabic pattern however, and I scanned this as 7,8,5,5. (S1)
and the doubling of 7,7 as a substitute for 5, 5. Apart from this, the beat was the same, apart from a rearrangement of the order. To continue in the correct anapestic order (stressed, unstressed) The stress could not have fallen on the word lush. Unless you shoved in trochee, in which case the meter would still be lost, because a line may not consist entirely of them, and if you did this, that is the form the line would have taken. Do not think that I did not notice the improper use of the word "alike" over "like"-you did this for the double syllabic value, I'm sure, and to make the syllable count.
I'm sure you had a plan in mind for this. You used a lot of abstract nouns and adjectives with a triple or more syllabic count, which does work, as long as it is not a compromise fro the content. Otherwise, it seems disingenous. You have the Bones of a strong poem here, though I am sceptical of the topic you choose. Many people will read it based on the topic, as opposed to the strength of content.
you're welcome,
black.
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 22nd June 2006 @ 07:14:24 PM AEST
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Comment deleted due to offensive content. Do not fight between yourselves on another person's poem. It is rude and unsuitable and will not be permitted. If you wish to fight keep it private. - Moderator_16 |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by ButchHoward on
Friday, 23rd June 2006 @ 03:17:19 PM AEST
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| Thank you for the support Elizabeth. It's a beautiful and moving poem
Butch
Content of comment deleted. Do not fight on another persons poem. - Moderator_16 |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 23rd June 2006 @ 07:59:31 PM AEST
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Yes, the military loves you, keep writing Mother Elizabeth
Hugs,
RaquelLeah |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by sararose1950 on
Friday, 23rd June 2006 @ 08:46:33 PM AEST
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Hugs Elizabeth!! Yes our troops are often not appreciated much- very well said indeed!!
As for your new fan- how did you find one??
(digs in me trunk for a loin cloth* heheeheehe that should do the trick!!!
Peace and Light.......Sara |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jeff_Scott_Morehead on
Thursday, 29th June 2006 @ 12:23:22 PM AEST
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What an impressive presentation.
Excellent.
Jeff |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Leslie on
Friday, 14th July 2006 @ 12:44:15 PM AEST
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| I am overcome with emotion. Your poem evokes memories of young friends I have lost in a past war. My life, with freedom and prosperity given to me by them, has moved on. BUT, I will never, ever forget them or their sacrifice. Thankyou for writing such a wonderful tribute to all who have given their lives for us. |
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Re: Yellow Ribbons Fade So Fast
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lionel on
Saturday, 15th July 2006 @ 02:56:18 PM AEST
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| Wonderful poem. It amazes me that our young people can be so heroic, considering how the people of our Country have changed in belief and morals over the last 47 years, since I was in the navy. |
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