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Spin The Bottle
Contributed by
needledancing
on
Friday, 12th January 2007 @ 09:10:59 AM in AEST
Topic:
drugabuse
|
There you are my needed friend awaiting my arrival,
There you are with slender lines my guaranted survival.
My lips will touch your hungry neck and hold you tenderly,
Your nectar given now so sweet sets all my feelings free.
How dedicated is your love to meet me here this way,
To free my fears so I can deal with all my life today.
You're never late to travel through this tortured soul of mine.
Extracting wisdom hidden deep delivering divine.
I'm listened to, I'm noticed when you and I are one.
Why is it that now I find we are no longer fun?
The others who you shared me with now think me such a fool.
When did you take the whole of me? How did you get so cruel?
I will not let you have me. You will stay locked inside.
I will not give my dignity. You must leave me my pride.
I have to do it on my own now that I know my truth.
I've got my inner wisdom now. I leave behind my youth.
Copyright ©
needledancing
... [
2007-01-12 09:10:59]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Spin The Bottle
(User Rating: 1 )
by yangdantien on
Thursday, 15th February 2007 @ 08:05:42 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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This is very good. The preface tie in works effectively. A bit of polish and double check will help it shine. The metric was also fitting of one who is young and ties into the last line. A strong talent is present and should write, write and not stop.
Well Done
Peace
Yang |
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Re: Spin The Bottle
(User Rating: 1 )
by MoonlightKiss on
Wednesday, 23rd September 2009 @ 02:34:25 PM AEST
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a Message)
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i really liked it :)
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