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broken out loud
Contributed by
random_kisses_xoxo
on
Tuesday, 30th January 2007 @ 09:49:15 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
beautifuly broken,
her heart on the floor
as she writes his name,
red lipstick on the door
shes giving it up
and shes letting him go
the feel of his love
is one she will never know
hes holding her back
by holding off goodbye
and then he leaves her waiting
just until the next time
shes done with the tears
this cant be her fate
shes trying so hard
but its herself that she hates
she wants everyone happy
every day and every time
she wants to be a hero
but not the kind that stop crimes
she wants to be the friend
who makes the pain go away
to be the perfect girlfriend
so just maybe he'll stay
she hates herself for what shes not
and what she'll never be
she just cant seem to find the good
she cant see what her friends see
her boyfriends never even around
he lives so far away
she pretends its not a big deal
but it kills her more each day
she'll run until her legs give out
she dosnt know what lifes about
what you give, you get in return
this stupid girl will never learn
she'll cry until the pain has stopped
she'll scream until her heart has dropped
she is everything i would hate to be
this stupid girl is really me
Copyright ©
random_kisses_xoxo
... [
2007-01-30 21:49:15]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Tuesday, 30th January 2007 @ 09:56:16 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Heartbreaking write, nice flow and rhyme.
Michelle |
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by MisfitMe on
Tuesday, 30th January 2007 @ 10:09:51 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I agree w/ my friend, shelby, there...
HEARTBREAKING, ABSOLUTELY HEARTBREAKING !!!
I want to tuck you in & tell you the Big Bad world will go away...& you are all too worthy in so many ways, you need to learn to see...truely!
Nigh~night, sweetheart...
BigLoveMuchPeace
~Misfitme |
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by unknown_utopia on
Tuesday, 30th January 2007 @ 10:28:45 PM AEST
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Excellent
loved the way this flowed |
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by jaded41reason on
Tuesday, 30th January 2007 @ 10:46:16 PM AEST
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| wow this is really great!!! |
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by bluestars on
Wednesday, 31st January 2007 @ 02:11:17 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Wow this is an awesome poem
I can really relate too
Keep up the great writing and thanks for sharing
your talent with us
Best wishes |
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by trialnerror on
Wednesday, 31st January 2007 @ 08:41:37 AM AEST
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| beautifully written and gets the message accross wonderfully , nice rhymes, smooth flow, loved it!! |
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Re: broken out loud
(User Rating: 1 )
by PhantomVampyress on
Wednesday, 31st January 2007 @ 01:41:05 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
beautifully written.. I love the first wording "beautifully broken" this is so heartbreaking but so straight forward and powerful. .I love this write.. splendid
vampyress jenni |
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