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Seven day waiting period
Contributed by
holderofthestone
on
Wednesday, 21st February 2007 @ 10:31:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
I went to the store today to buy
A way I can escape
Then the man told me
Seven days is what it takes
So I gave him all my info
My life story, tho it sucks
He said just seven days
Granted with good luck
So I bought the box of shells
And went home to count the days
I etched your name on one of them
And silently I prayed
Day one took forever
Waiting all the while
But when I thought of the end
I cracked a little smile
Then day two rolled along
And I ran home to cross it out
On the calendar I made
Five more days therell be no doubt
When day three finally ended
I sat at home and had a drink
Finally its coming
Getting closer to the brink!
Day four seemed to drag on
Waiting for the joy
Thinking three more days
Then Ill get my toy
Day five came and went
With nothing much to say
Like the rest of my life
It was just another day
Day six got me excited
Ive only got one more
Til I say **** you all
Ill take your **** no more
Day seven wouldnt ever end
It seemed to take forever
Thinking of my ties to you
And this world Ill finally sever
When finally I picked it up
The package made me proud
Now you cant control me
Youre no longer aloud
I skipped home so happily
the first time in many years
smiling and crying
laughing shedding tears...
I took the shell that has your name
Etched into the case
I loaded it into the chamber
And thought about your face
I laughed a little chuckle
Thinking of the past
And all the ******** lies
The way that nothing lasts
I finally found the strength
A way to break the chains
To stop this beating heart
And the life that it sustains
I simply say goodbye to you
And give a simple squeeze
As the round passed through my head
I heard the faintest breeze
Fading fast and withering
This life comes to a close
This is how it ends
Thats all there is I suppose...
And as I die and slip away
I'm feeling so free spirited
So much for your ********
And your seven day waiting period
Copyright ©
holderofthestone
... [
2007-02-21 22:31:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Seven day waiting period
(User Rating: 1 )
by MickeyPigKnuckles on
Wednesday, 21st February 2007 @ 11:38:24 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
holderofthestone, this is an awesome composure as I am certain many can and will relate to it. I really liked your descriptions of the seven days and was hoping for a different ending as the loss of life via this means is sad, very sad. Wonderful Poem. Thank you for sharing both your creative personality and your talent of poetry with us all.
Mickey Pig Knuckles
 [imageshack.us] |
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Re: Seven day waiting period
(User Rating: 1 )
by inlovewithaladd on
Thursday, 22nd February 2007 @ 12:25:25 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| this poem kind of drags, i feel a bit bored by the lack of visual stimulation. the ending was really good though, i like the twist though i'm a sucker for a twist. keep at it! |
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Re: Seven day waiting period
(User Rating: 1 )
by Malcolmsdreamgirl on
Thursday, 22nd February 2007 @ 03:11:46 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I liked this poem and the days - reading it tho just makes me realise more and more how precious life is and how simply it can be ended
such a waste of a beautiful gift
Surely there is more to life to encourage the sad to not waste it?
Good luck out there
Dee xx |
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Re: Seven day waiting period
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 22nd February 2007 @ 07:42:02 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| makes me cry that you feel this way about life. sad but good poem again. You would be so terribly missed ..... |
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Re: Seven day waiting period
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 15th June 2007 @ 02:14:12 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Hey holder .. .saw you on and thought I'd drop by your page
to see if there was anything new ... and what a shock I got!!!
But ... in getting over the initial shock of the piece, I have to
say this was so very well written. Wow. It was kind of an "edge
of the seat" write ... like a thriller where you know something
is going to happen any minute. so much in here was
hard-hitting and emotional, but none so much as the "name
etched into the shell" .... and then it being loaded into the
chamber. Holy hell, what an impact! Brilliantly poetic,
my friend.
Hoping things are better for you and that at least some of
the anguish and hatred was released with the words on
the page ~
Take care ...
~Breezy |
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