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Shut In
Contributed by
untitled
on
Tuesday, 20th March 2007 @ 07:20:03 PM in AEST
Topic:
psychoticpoems
|
The door is closing,
I'll be shut in forever.
I''m still chained to this wall.
666 ft. away.
I'm chained to this wall today,
and tomorrow
and the next tomorrow...again.
But I am not afraid.
I've survived.
I'm feed by that someone.
I'm clothed by that someone.
I do want to get away.
Truly.
But I can't.
I wan''t won't.
I never will.
The door is shutting.
Goodbye light.
Farewell warmth.
So long, hope,
dreams.
Perhaps I'll see you again.
Though I won't feel you,
see you..
or hear those
beautiful bells.
or see a clean, baby blue ribbon.
But for now...
I'm trapped in this house
on this wall
behind this creaking door.
Oh well...
I still have my chains...
my grim,
dirt and sadness.
...No...
I don't feel sad.
or happy
or anything.
I wonder why?
Is that a good or bad thing?
No worries.
I'll have plenty of time to think
now that I'm alone.
Copyright ©
untitled
... [
2007-03-20 19:20:03]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Shut In
(User Rating: 1 )
by sicknivesevered on
Wednesday, 21st March 2007 @ 03:32:05 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| This starts out pretty well. The "666 ft. away" line is cool. Once it gets to "Goodbye" though, it starts losing its feel to me. |
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Re: Shut In
(User Rating: 1 )
by darkangeleyes57 on
Tuesday, 3rd April 2007 @ 04:01:47 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
This was good. I liked the way that you wrote this. Great poem.
Take care
Christina |
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