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Closure
Contributed by
Man_On_High
on
Wednesday, 4th April 2007 @ 05:56:30 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
I can remember
down the smokey air.. your calling;
hurling my heart to a cloud
bearing me 'way from the valley and city-
from places of pity darkly swarming
and stunted with life.
Sibilant eddys.. and flowers brimming with song
things you said and celebrated
with canjoined agony and affection,
bourne to me by your sudden swift whisper on the wind
and shallow rush of zealous possession,
stealing my breath past streams and pavement
in that moment out of time;
long ago from now, in one that finds me small and alone.
Though wind and rain and growing things of earth
were brother to my mood in the last last union,
still you sing proudly into peace under a turbulent sky
where your heart's abiding passion lay
though you strode rather than stepped through my life
surpassing by far, many demure blooms in your career..
blunt with sensitivity, trading not with images
but imperatives, you became solicitous
and mute of mayhem;
crashing into me, indignant with healing-
the arrows of your own sorrow now flashing into my mind~
Hippocratic to the anonymously poor and maimed
loud with tenderness for broken things..
having created havens of strength and beliefs-
teetering on vanity.. strong and innocent of malice,
beautiful in the last and only sense.
I do not feel your absence as pain..
and though knowledge of love, once given and once gained
may be lost or betrayed into unforgiving,
there are always rainbows.
B
Copyright ©
Man_On_High
... [
2007-04-04 17:56:30]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dom on
Wednesday, 4th April 2007 @ 07:04:32 PM AEST
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I particularly liked the last stanza of this because it holds so much hope and understanding.
Your descriptions are simply beautiful, this line stood out for me:
'Sibilant eddys.. and flowers brimming with song'
Your acceptance and strength during an obviously difficult event are admirable.
Well done, I really enjoyed reading this,
Dom |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Thursday, 5th April 2007 @ 05:35:11 AM AEST
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interesting write
Whisper |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Friday, 6th April 2007 @ 05:57:43 PM AEST
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Hey B,
I've already read this at least five times and i t just grabs me still.
Don't know who u r writing about but this is beautifull.
Big huggs, mucho smiles,
emy |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Friday, 6th April 2007 @ 06:28:46 PM AEST
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Dearest B~
I know life for you hasn't been a walk in the park and you have had more than your fair share of down days. The love front hasn't been smooth sailing either, but I promise things will get better hun they always do. Do not give up hope. Tomorrow is always a new day~ In life we need closure to be able to move on my dear friend.
Even in the toughest of times you are able to pen such beautiful descriptive masterpieces admirably dearest Billy~
May the path you choose be a much smoother one and may guardian angels always watch over you~
A rainbow of love, joy & happiness sent to you to warm your beautiful yet pained heart my dear friend.
With the utmost respect ,
Love always your fan/friend,
Dreamer~ |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Saturday, 7th April 2007 @ 04:55:59 AM AEST
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wow Billy you ok?
i am here if you ever want to talk to someone.
i know i haven't been on here much lately been working alot and no time to write.
i gotta say again you have got to be the best poet here besides venkat.
anyways take care
hugs |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by needledancing on
Monday, 16th April 2007 @ 12:15:07 PM AEST
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| What a magnificent piece. I just went wow on completion. The title says it all. Closure can take time and much reflection of who we are after the closure of so much sharing of each other.The depth to which you are reaching sounds like what will be a painful one but knowingly successful. |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Wednesday, 25th April 2007 @ 05:39:39 PM AEST
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truely beautiful...
love n' hugs nessa |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by nanb294eva on
Sunday, 10th June 2007 @ 04:19:24 PM AEST
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I do not feel your absence as pain..
and though knowledge of love, once given and once gained
may be lost or betrayed into unforgiving,
there are always rainbows.
I KNOW THIS POEM COULD NOT HAVE BEEN WRITTEN OUR FIRST TIME AROUND
I WILL ALWAYS FEEL YOUR ABSENCE AS PAIN
EVERYTIME I LOOK TO THE SKY |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Monday, 18th June 2007 @ 01:19:10 AM AEST
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hey bro, i really liked this, i captures the feeling of 'emptiness' i know so well, though your depiction retains but a chance of hope...nice job!
wiz |
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on
Wednesday, 11th July 2007 @ 03:32:58 AM AEST
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Stunning…wonderful work, hit me close to home
Beautifully described as always
Your fan-
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Re: Closure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 22nd July 2007 @ 03:30:39 AM AEST
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plagiarism!
This was bold and quite the task because you plagiarized John Burroughs but you did it by taking certain lines from many of his writings and forming on big poem. YOU ARE AN EPIC FRAUD!
JOHN BURROUGHS [www.wakerobin.org] |
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