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awake..
Contributed by
wazarov
on
Sunday, 23rd March 2003 @ 03:45:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
awake
i left my soul by the lake
i cried for her sake
but there was nothing to give or to take
all the truth was fake
with everything that i forsake
there is no difference that i can make
but my voice surely will shake you awake
and i shall forgive what you will take
because deadly is the bite of your snake
Copyright ©
wazarov
... [
2003-03-23 15:45:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: awake..
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 24th March 2003 @ 07:31:09 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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I am sorry to be negative but I find it really hard to read poems where the lines ALL end with the same rhyming sound.
The poem is really good but I found myself getting lost.
sleepless_siren |
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Re: awake..
(User Rating: 1 )
by MoonlitAngel on
Monday, 24th March 2003 @ 12:52:01 PM AEST
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Wow great job! Never realized how many words end in "ake"... seems to me that would be difficult to do. Kudos! Blessed be,
~ Moonlit Angel |
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