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I wish I wouldn't wish like this
Contributed by
bluethewolf
on
Saturday, 21st March 2009 @ 09:21:26 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
When you're stumping on my soul,
remember that I'm feeling it
When you're playing with my feelings,
open your hand and let me loose
Though what I feel for you is so true,
I have to let you go
Though you're what you are,
I'm not good enough
You caress me with your tongue so sweetly,
you and only you make me feel like this
Truth be told, all I've wanted was and is you,
since we've met you haven't failed to seduce me
I wish I had the strength to just walk away,
but with a smile I know you know I can't just walk away!
So, we will continue this game of up and down,
repeating and returning to the beginning
I don't even know if what I think is true is true,
but you know and without knowing it you're controlling this ride
I continue to sit in this seat, looking up at you as constantly you pull the lever down,
pull it back up, and say how much you like me
I wish I was never this lonely, and I wish I never met you,
you are different from any one I've ever known and thats what keeps me here
I'm waiting at your feet,
waiting for your brief caress
It feels so nice sometimes the things you say,
and how it brightens this life I'm living
How tonight, the things are crowding around me, stabbing at me, laughing,
all the things that bring tears to my eyes
The big ball of tiny things like cells that form together,
they make me cripple, they take away the sun that shines, they make me avoid it
How the light burns my skin and make me ache,
how it make this pain real even if it is not
I'm so trapped inside my mind,
gnawing at the bars that hold me hostage
I don't what is real and what is not,
if only I could meditate on it going away and it would
If only the thing that holds me back could disappear,
if only god had not created the thing that is me
I hate looking at myself,
seeing myself turn away, it hurts
I want to feel I can be loved, though it isnt possible,
I wish I could lie in the tub with my head under water until life slips from my body
I wish I wouldn't feel the need to express what I feel,
it makes the tearing bleeding go away, though the scars do not
I wish could be like every one else in this home,
I wish I wouldn't wish like this
I wish I wouldn't come here,
I wish I didn't drink tonight
Copyright ©
bluethewolf
... [
2009-03-21 21:21:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I wish I wouldn't wish like this
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Saturday, 21st March 2009 @ 09:30:50 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Dang this is total sad. It is hard when you are caught up in a merry go round, I know. You want to let go but cannot do it, beat yourself up....... Ya know what though? When it is needed you will know what to do and what action and direction to take. Funny thing about our human condition and inner voice.
Cheer up be happy dance in the rain!
Hugs
Michelle
Profound writing here once more
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Re: I wish I wouldn't wish like this
(User Rating: 1 )
by NaTaChKaH on
Sunday, 22nd March 2009 @ 08:39:06 PM AEST
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Definitely in touch with your sadness, and the first step to happiness is releasing the bad stuff. I have many a sad poem, and why, to release it out of my soul so I don't crumple up for days on end wishing I were not here.
*huggzz*
NaTaChKaH |
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