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what ifs
Contributed by
rossdean
on
Friday, 28th August 2009 @ 03:17:26 AM in AEST
Topic:
anguished
|
Conscience
is the essence
There is no fragrance
or clearance
Just a presence
If only i'd done this
Or seen what was amiss
and not to dismiss
I can't turn the clocks back
or attack
He was my brother
It was for him to decide
Suicide
Copyright ©
rossdean
... [
2009-08-28 03:17:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: what ifs
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Friday, 28th August 2009 @ 06:05:16 AM AEST
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a Message)
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excellent rhyme and rhythm - compelling, with a sharply stalled finish that ended a great introspect. Lost a brother to suicide too - this one connected, bro.
Spike |
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Re: what ifs
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 28th August 2009 @ 07:23:46 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Very passionate with a biting style; a well written, well controlled poem.
-Phil |
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Re: what ifs
(User Rating: 1 )
by Ambivalence on
Friday, 28th August 2009 @ 12:17:12 PM AEST
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i hope this helped u clear your heavy mind a little bit, but of course always keep him in your heart. it's not your fault...truly sorry to hear bout your tragedy.
take care
-K.Z. |
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Re: what ifs
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 30th December 2009 @ 05:31:52 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Yet again my eyes got wet reading your poetry!
I truly hope it helped you, anyhow no-one can
help you through this but yourself. If it somehow did not. I am humble to the fact that you are bold enough to publish this.
I envy your rhyming-skill! |
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