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sincerety of how i feel.
Contributed by
owkenny
on
Wednesday, 16th September 2009 @ 10:39:35 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
people try so hard to explain this feeling
writing stories, song, movie even just dreaming
but no one has ever come close to finding the words
and i understand why none were satisfied with their work
i could name every sweet lyric in any song
but no matter which i pick, it would be wrong
cause even though their words may be true
i know no one has ever felt the way i feel about you
the evening has such beauty in the sky
and when i see it, only you appear in front of my eyes
every gorgeous scene i could ever see
just becomes the reflection of when you look at me
you say you are more in love than me
even though i doubt its possible, i still agree
cause i dont want to ever have to bicker
even if the reason is so hair-triggered
I was so independent before we met
but when we are together, i think of the past and forget
for the few moments we share intertwined
Im yours and you are mine
call it falling stupid for you if you wish
but Im glad i took that risk
and now i feel like all my life, i was stalling
falling stupid maybe, but either way, Ive fallen
words may be meaningless but i love to remind you
so even though you already know it, i love you
chivalry may be dead but i can still try
and i think i see life in it when i see the smile in your eyes.
I love you with every exhausted breathe i have
the second you leave, i count the hours till you are back
and you give me the greatest gift i could ever ask
and that would be you loving me this much back
Copyright ©
owkenny
... [
2009-09-16 22:39:35]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: sincerety of how i feel.
(User Rating: 1 )
by TsunamiWaverider on
Wednesday, 16th September 2009 @ 11:07:26 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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Nice sentiments, but it needs a bit of work to make it 'flow' more smoothly and polish it a little better. Maybe the first two verses might sound better as:
People try hard to explain this feeling
writing stories, songs, movies, and even just dreaming
but no one has ever found the right words
(and i understand why none were satisfied with their work) - YOU NEED TO FIND ANOTHER WORD TO RHYME WITH 'WORDS'
I could name all the lyrics in any love song
but whatever i picked, it still would be wrong,
and even though all their words may be true
i know no-one has felt the way i feel about you.
Hopefully i have been of help and haven't insulted you. |
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