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Together
Contributed by
dirk-velvet
on
Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 06:42:49 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
i envy people sometimes. some people. couples mainly.
i sit alone on a coffee counter stool and eat.
next to me in a booth sits a young couple.
they look good.
they laugh hold hands eat. ... together.
i think back to the time when i was ... together.
it really wasn't all that great.
so in jealousy i sit here and think ...
"they're probably not all that happy".
they finish eating and leave the money on the table.
the girl makes a joke about the tip.
they laugh and kiss and hold hands as they walk out the door.
i watch them get into their car. they kiss while pulling across the safety belts.
they smile to each other and drive off.
"maybe they'll fight when they get home".
Copyright ©
dirk-velvet
... [
2009-11-13 06:42:49] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by laststarontheleft on
Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 07:54:28 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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This is a very interesting poem.
Your scars are very apparent here,
and I really hope you find some
happiness very soon.
Best wishes Last Star x x x |
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by longhaircg on
Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 08:48:24 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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yes this so sad to think this way, I still believe in love and it only hurts when its not there, I hope you find that one day, I would do it again in a heart beat,
sp |
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 05:54:09 PM AEST (User
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I'm sorry dirk, I know that you must have some painful memories in your
past, (who doesn't right?), but I actually got a chuckle out of the last two
lines. Wow. Now THAT is a perfect description of sour grapes if I've ever
seen one. I have felt what your narrator does. I won't assume this is from
real life, but if it is, just know you are not alone. Humans are hopeless.
We have chronic "grass-is-always-greener" syndrome. We are never
satisfied.
Excellent piece. Stirs the depths of the reader.
~ Breezy
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by ming on
Friday, 13th November 2009 @ 07:28:40 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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DV,
Obviously from the 3 comments before mine you can tell that you have written an excellent poem. You pullled us in and we felt. Way to go...
ming |
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by joydeep_nath on
Sunday, 22nd November 2009 @ 03:23:27 AM AEST (User
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hi there good |
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by 143 on
Friday, 4th December 2009 @ 11:52:03 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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The old dust always settles my friend
"We all know that"
Reguardless who you are , Money don't matter...Even tiger woods will tell you that lol |
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Re: Together
(User Rating: 1 ) by kleetas on
Friday, 4th December 2009 @ 12:39:55 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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maybe on their way home they will see a lady biker on a bonneville with a silly smile on her face and they'll say...i wish we had a motorcycle and a silly grin on our faces! |
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