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HAPPY ENDINGS II
Contributed by
lovingcritters
on
Saturday, 24th July 2010 @ 08:24:32 PM in AEST
Topic:
HumorPoetry
|
HAPPY ENDINGS II
I left my Fairy Tale suspended on a dark
and gloomy night
As Snow White above, went crazy with all her
little ones, and took flight.
She was found wandering, but finally she
was declared, "All Right!"
However;
When they got her all cleaned up,
she was more than just "A Sight!"
No scientist, nor Dr. can say what happened to her.
She had gained 300 lbs, and resembled a "Bouncer!"
A "fast food" mind that kept telling her she was
"Little Red Riding Hood!"
She began a Fairy Tale all of her own,
similar to mine, only a bigger falsehood!
*****
During her meandering times, her appetite had increased
Penniless, she wandered into an "Old Folk's home, and
straight into the "Belly of the Beast!"
She nearly passed out at the sight of him,
it was her favorite "Tweety Bird"
60 years old now, aged, featherless, he couldn't even
"Tweet" he was "Too Tweetered!"
Stunned, shocked, and completely disillusioned,
she began to wander down the hall.
That's when she stopped to observe the old man
seated on the edge of "Sleeping Beauty's" bed,
she began to bawl.......
With his loving kiss he had resurrected her,
but they didn't live happily after.....
*****
She began to age, and she hated more than
anything her wrinkles!
She contacted the wicked ole witch, and
she repeated the sleeping crumbles!
"Sleeping Beauty" is now ageless, time has
stopped for her, but not for him.
He is now senile, his loving thoughts for her bedim.
"Little Red Riding Hood" was known for her survival skills;
after all it was she that had escaped the Old Wolf's drills.
But the next episode set her for a spin, one for which she
swayed, and felt betrayed.
She inquired of the Chef, "What is this called, this most delectable fish?"
He muttered between his lips, I believe she was called,
"The Little Merimaid!
Therein lies the reason for her overeating, especially at
McDonald's the fast "Beef" place.
They always offered her "Super Size" and she
unwittingly agreed, not knowing it was her
body she would misplace.
*****
In most of our Fairy Tales, whether good or grim
The Good Fairy Godmother saves us all with a grin.
She suddenly appeared, "I give you just one wish
Little Red Riding Hood, but I've lost my "Thin Dust,"
so I can't make you thin.
Thinking she was being" Wolfed" as before, she
chose to become another star.......
This one was famous, thin, and trim, she asked
to become "Barbie Doll" in her boudoir!
You have to be losing your
mind to compose
such a rhyme
The Land of Fairy,
Where nobody gets old and godly and grave,
Where nobody gets old and crafty and wise,
Where nobody gets old and bitter of tongue.
William Butler Yeats
The Land of Heart's Desire.
*Senile Smiles*
Copyright ©
lovingcritters
... [
2010-07-24 20:24:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by LovingWhispers on
Saturday, 24th July 2010 @ 10:18:22 PM AEST
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HAHAHAHA!!! Sis ta Takoda..You provided me with some much needed entertainment for my afternoon here across the pond!
I think I could do with some wanderings in the woods and BIG beef burgers :P
Lovin' your mind dear one
Blessings
LW
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 25th July 2010 @ 12:25:35 AM AEST
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Goodness gracious, this is just too funny!!! *chuckles again* Oh, and I especially love Tweety! You kill me.  |
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by cashfan1 on
Sunday, 25th July 2010 @ 02:53:02 AM AEST
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Fantastic!! how well you cheer this old Brit,
your sense of humour is wicked. many thanks for sharing this.
Dennis. |
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by Elizabeth_Dandy on
Sunday, 25th July 2010 @ 06:07:12 AM AEST
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Mamma mia, you are incredible. Loftiness and naughtiness in one single personality. And to boot it, a wit impossible to match no matter what skills the Lord bestowd.
You are qite unique beloved.
Graced with so extraordiary gifts.
that exted over so wide and diverse scopes
I just see Red Riding ood explodinjg comig out of
MacDonalds.
Blessigs naughty one, full of surprises.
Thanks a lot
Elizabeth. |
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by spud on
Sunday, 25th July 2010 @ 06:58:00 AM AEST
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Hi Connie,
''He couldn't even tweet! He was too tweetered!''
My sides are aching !!!!!!!!!
To heck with the originals, I like your versions
better!
Insanity is roaming in Wyoming!!!!!
Keep em comin', C!!
Tommy
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by andrewjones12 on
Monday, 26th July 2010 @ 06:51:05 AM AEST
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miss loving, what an extraordinary peice, but nothing but is expected from one with such talent, as ive said before. this was very funny consue, but for some reason i felt......something more behind it. im not sure what, and it might take me a few before i can identify the feeling, but ill write you when i can grasp it. i loved your clever line, '
"Little Red Riding Hood" was known for her survival skills;
after all it was she that had escaped the Old Wolf's drills."
AWSOME!
much love,
-andrew.
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on
Monday, 26th July 2010 @ 08:40:59 AM AEST
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Well I can nobody can accuse you of taking the run of the mill poetry route !!.
Certainly an interesting piece.
I wonder how that wafted into your mind !!......good work!!
Steve |
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Re: HAPPY ENDINGS II
(User Rating: 1 )
by Pat346 on
Friday, 6th August 2010 @ 09:39:30 AM AEST
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| I love it! Funny stuff!! |
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