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A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
Contributed by
lovingcritters
on
Wednesday, 4th August 2010 @ 10:12:37 PM in AEST
Topic:
HumorPoetry
|
A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
A new Wal*Mart opened up in Florida state.
This one was "Supersized" don't go if you're a "cheapskate"
New fangled advertisements that sound as you roam around.
They've even added odors to entice an appetite's rebound
The produce stand has an automatic "water mister" to keep things fresh.
You'll hear thunder, flashing lightening, and the smell of rain,
then "gooseflesh"
The little kids just love this next one, when you open
the doors to the milk case........
The "Moooooooing' of cows is heard, and a big cow
jumps out, it's a whiteface!
Scares the liver out of the little ones, and most cry
Their scare is short lived however; by the time they
hit the next counter, their eyes are dry.
The first thing you notice is the smell, after scaring little children
with noise of a cow,
They've left out the noise of a chicken here, so there's a strong aroma
of bacon frying, no more frightened children they avow!
As you approach the bread department, "Heaven's Sent Smell"
that of Home made bread!"
To make up for the "Scary Cow" this is where the little
ones are "free cookies" fed!
Aroma of charcoal grilled steaks and brats at the Meat Dept.
draw a crowd.
The odors in this department are so pungent, and real, that
children are not allowed!
Of course children are not allowed in the Liquor Department, for
obvious reasons,
The tantalizing smells of beer, liquor, and wine are ever present,
and the longer you stand there the smell actually deepens!
The next isle has a similar feature........
Which, may account for the reason, that very few people
go to the department of toilet paper!
Created from a funny email
my dear friend Myrtle sent me,
Thanks so much
Myrtle!
Lovingcritters
ConSue
$$$$$
"Cry Havoc," and let slip the dogs of war, that this foul deed
shall smell above the earth with carrion men,
groaning for burial!"
~Shakespeare~
*Smelly Smiles*
Copyright ©
lovingcritters
... [
2010-08-04 22:12:37]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
(User Rating: 1 )
by cashfan1 on
Thursday, 5th August 2010 @ 11:23:52 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Connie
we have these stores too, Asda they are called here, nice write as always. thanks for
sharing. |
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Re: A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
(User Rating: 1 )
by chrisdavid on
Thursday, 5th August 2010 @ 11:54:20 AM AEST
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As always, another poem that brings a smile.
You always write something with humour, a joy to read.
Take care, Chris. |
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Re: A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
(User Rating: 1 )
by andrewjones12 on
Tuesday, 10th August 2010 @ 11:07:56 AM AEST
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Amazing Miss consue! I love this one; the way advertisement and attraction are used to manipulate our wallets! And how true about the crowd drawn by that typical disregard to the cow as you join around the smell of its charcoaled aroma=) I love your metaphors, and subliminal voicing. Well done connie, you have written another fine piece of work.
Much love’
Your friend
-andrew.
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Re: A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
(User Rating: 1 )
by spud on
Tuesday, 17th August 2010 @ 07:46:37 AM AEST
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Hi Connie,
All that death and larceny committed upon our
fellow creatures, displayed in neat cling wrap
with their dying invocations ringing in our ears
as background music - it's enough to make you
want to go to the toilet section!
Love the graphics. Nice one, Connie.
Tommy
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Re: A BRAND NEW WAL*MART
(User Rating: 1 )
by unknown_utopia on
Monday, 23rd August 2010 @ 10:38:41 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Funny but oh so true
good stuff. |
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