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Empathy
Contributed by
allforyou
on
Thursday, 31st March 2011 @ 07:20:47 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
The way it streams through you
before it comes out...
I can feel it burning underneath my skin
pushing to the surface
There it is in your gut stabbing,
me over and over
Like an atomic attack on my emotions,
dropping bombs like
Do you have a minute? I need to talk.
Now you tell me youve just discovered someone,
And you say their soul sings identically to yours;
I tell you your soul will start whoring for more.
And this war, it is there, its now inside of me,
Then I hear your voice making the same war-sounds;
I feel what youre feeling when youre feeling down.
Ive found now your emotions in me, animating,
Ive no more story words in my mouth, just my eyes;
Yet the tear falling down your cheek matches mine.
Copyright ©
allforyou
... [
2011-03-31 19:20:47]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Empathy
(User Rating: 1 )
by UNORTHODOX on
Thursday, 31st March 2011 @ 11:32:07 PM AEST
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A truely captivating write
the metaphors are brilliant
the story close to all of our hearts, poetically flawless
well composed from start to finnish
-UNORTHODOX |
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Re: Empathy
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Friday, 1st April 2011 @ 01:55:02 PM AEST
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This is sad but written by a pro.
Yet the tear falling down your cheek matches mine.”
Awesome.
Blessings,
emy |
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Re: Empathy
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 11th May 2012 @ 12:30:41 AM AEST
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You took a word (the title) and really brilliantly wrote a freaking perfect poem describing that word.
I find myself even liking the author's note.
I need to read this again after I finish with this comment!
Like an atomic attack on my emotions,
dropping bombs like…
‘Do you have a minute? I need to talk.’
Gad, love that!
Thanks,
Tim
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