|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
stay
Contributed by
anara
on
Sunday, 10th June 2012 @ 03:53:32 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Breath it in
And know its real
the chains have snapped
And now you can feel
That taste is freedom
The feeling is joy
Don't look back
Just look this way
Keep your eyes on me
I'll keep you safe
I'll take you away
You'll be my everything
Only joy
No more pain
Let me keep you sane
Stay with me
I'll Chase the darkness away
Because when your with me its a brand new day
Copyright ©
anara
... [
2012-06-10 15:53:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: stay
(User Rating: 1 )
by Waynster on
Sunday, 10th June 2012 @ 04:15:10 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
You started your poem of nicely, then wandered off with your words. Just when a reader gets into the poem, they get cut off or thrown about by an insecure stanza of words. You started with a wonderful flow, then you wandered and at the end brought back the flow. I feel that you can write very well and would like to see another poem that you write.
Wayne |
|
|
Re: stay
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Sunday, 10th June 2012 @ 06:46:58 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| The title reminds me of a song a wrote a few years ago. While the rhythym can use some work it is worth a read. |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Site Help
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
