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The Old Lady
Contributed by
ValDohren
on
Saturday, 27th October 2012 @ 05:06:43 AM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
With furrowed brow and silvered hair
Crumpled low in her rocking chair
Draped in a shawl of tattered lace
A thousand years upon her face
And sallowed cheeks, the rosy cast
Of girlhood, having long since passed
She raised her eyes up to the sun
For now she knew her life was done
So many stories she had told
Across the years, as she grew old
But now the time was drawing near
To be with those she loved most dear
She meekly smiled and gave a sigh
In mem`ry of the years gone by
Then glanced down at her wedding band
Hung loose upon her withered hand
Her eyes then gazed towards the place
Where stood a portrait of his face
The first and only love she`d known
Which blossomed like a rose, full grown
And as she looked, her eyes grew dim
(She thought she caught a glimpse of him!)
But only shadows filled the room
The wilted rose, no more to bloom
She stroked her hair, and then her breast
Where once her sleeping children pressed
And in her lonely room did weep
Then passed into eternal sleep
Copyright ©
ValDohren
... [
2012-10-27 05:06:43]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Old Lady
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rakerman1999 on
Saturday, 27th October 2012 @ 08:03:37 AM AEST
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Excellent emotional writing. Your r&r were spot on. Quite refreshing to read someone who is so technically sound and still able to bring thier heart through to the reader.
Very well done my friend .
Raker |
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Re: The Old Lady
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th October 2012 @ 08:31:52 AM AEST
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| SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL, I'LL READ THIS A FEW MORE TIMES, WELL BALANCED RYTHM AND FLOW AND BEAUTIFULLY PORTRAYED |
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Re: The Old Lady
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 27th October 2012 @ 01:53:35 PM AEST
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 to YPDC!
You summed up her beautiful life so succinctly and with grace. Very nicely done. Brings a smile and brings a tear.
Thank you,
Tim |
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Re: The Old Lady
(User Rating: 1 )
by elle on
Monday, 29th October 2012 @ 09:02:08 AM AEST
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Hi :)
I agree with all the loving comments already posted. I"ll only add that my heart
is touched by your gentle spirit that is etched so beautifully within your words.
elle |
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Re: The Old Lady
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Sunday, 22nd September 2013 @ 07:33:35 AM AEST
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poignant, honest, and true to the biography of life and its passing. Larry was right about the technique.
S. |
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