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Need for Narcissism
Contributed by
Jyssvw
on
Thursday, 23rd May 2013 @ 07:05:18 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
It's a tough road to travel alone
As others fly by
My pace feels subdued and burdened
The sense of urgency plagues me
To what end?
I am never sure
From one moment to the next
In anticipation of tomorrow with only dreams of yesterday to hold me tight
The mental illness that controls me has no name
No clinically found
Similarly, the evil that follows me remains obscure
However , they are no less there , as sure as the air I breathe and the ground I stand upon , they wreak havoc on my conscious and torment my sleep
I have but one viable option
I have given up the fight
I concede
Release them upon me
Let the demons of my past and the thieves of my future have their way with me
Let them rape me of my innocence
Steal from me my hope
Let the antagonists of my emotions add salt to my wounds
Direct my negativity so that any optimism is crushed and mangled
Finally, let me not strive for happiness ,for each attempt is a cataclysmic let down exacerbating my already indifferent and apathetic view of the world that has thus far cradled me into this deep hole of lies and unforgivingness
I hope to not be remembered a quitter
Rather someone who has accepted his destiny of below mediocrity and substandard deserving of love from otherwise good people who have a choice
They should ,and eventually all do ,decided to leave me be to my self loathing and misanthropic attitudes towards others
Not so much a revelation but rather a summation of my daily pride meandering away
Once long and hard attempts are now limp and shriveled deficits
Subtracting from my manhood
Enticing no one
Inside I can feel my zest for life slowly eroding into nothing more than the most primitive human needs of food, sex and shelter
Even so ,I barely eat , my libido is dead , and I am homeless in more than one sense of the word
------
----------------
Copyright ©
Jyssvw
... [
2013-05-23 07:05:18]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Need for Narcissism
(User Rating: 1 )
by cherryamber on
Friday, 24th May 2013 @ 05:13:26 AM AEST
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a Message)
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wow. thank you for sharing. i am sure this would have been hard to write. amazing. i feel numb and thoughtful after that.
i know you dont want to hear this, but, theres no doubt that ***** is intense. I am sorry you have to experience that. Please read some Carl Jung. He may help you. Much love. |
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Re: Need for Narcissism
(User Rating: 1 )
by JimKoz on
Monday, 23rd December 2013 @ 09:34:21 PM AEST
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| I feel you. |
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