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The world doesn't work that way.
Contributed by
GloomyBlu
on
Sunday, 16th June 2013 @ 08:22:47 AM in AEST
Topic:
ApologyPoetry
|
The dreams in my head as I lay down in bed fill me with dread for the future.
The terrifying monster at the end of this book.
When the pages are infinite and there's nowhere else to look.
The shadow of this tome looms over me.
An omen of doom or a bed in a room
saved for the kind of crazy that rubs people just the wrong way.
And I'm unraveling at the seams and it seems to me my seamstress did a poor job sewing up my heart, but where can I start to begin again?
Where can I find a friend who's ship can carry me and us to a place where nobody tells us we can't.
But in this world you can't rely on anybody but yourself,
and myself is unreliable and liable to lie to me.
I'm not a friend that would die for me.
I'm not the person that I'd like to be.
And for that I'm sorry.
These scars I bear aren't fooling anyone
because these emotional wounds are self inflicted.
Though try as I might to pass off the blame,
it's always the same game repeating over and over again.
The same self righteous guilt piling up on me again.
"You're so humble" I mock me.
"You can't be that bad" I taunt me.
And I do nothing but disappoint me.
So I wish everyday I was better
as if some magical lamp can grant my desires
to be much more than a failure
like I'd wake up one day and find myself happy
that the sappy love songs ring true and we'd have a room with a view.
I can't promise you happiness or buy security from a store.
I can't ensure that I wont just bore or annoy you.
And it's not about getting better or struggling against some fetters,
but doing yourself justice by getting what you deserve:
not just a shell of a man who relies only on words,
who wishes to be beautiful.
You deserve someone who will treat you right
who can make ends meet
who has the insight to know when somethings wrong and to fix it.
Yet you still tell me I'm what you want and you love me for how I am.
And I love you for that but feel pain in my soul
that someone such as you can see me as a goal.
Copyright ©
GloomyBlu
... [
2013-06-16 08:22:47]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The world doesn't work that way.
(User Rating: 1 )
by karu on
Sunday, 16th June 2013 @ 10:57:06 AM AEST
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Re: The world doesn't work that way.
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 24th November 2013 @ 07:52:52 PM AEST
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Fantastic but sad.
I hope you realize that you have me mesmerized with your writing as I want stop till I finish.
Anyways, I'm really not that easy to be mesmerized in the written word or life.
blessings, huggs, smiles,
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