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Jumping in the shower ...
Contributed by
Jyssvw22
on
Friday, 20th June 2014 @ 05:43:03 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Your the absolute worst
It's gets no better
You are nothing good
No saving grace
You pull me down
I fight you back
You pull me in
I kiss your mouth
Get off me
Your nakedness
Does nothing
Unaroused
I walk limply
To the bathroom
From your bed
I stare in the mirror
Pump my chest
Flex my biceps
Tell myself
Do it
Why not
It might
Feel
Good
It
Always
Does
No
Really
Always
You idolize my body
You crave my entrance
You call my name
Here I am
How do you want me ?
Damn it
This is a horrible idea
I know you
You know me
I'm sober
Tricky
I can't possibly enjoy this
Your teeth hurt
Take it easy
Wow
Never
Have I
Experienced you like this before
Crawling towards me on the floor
Eyes focused
Skin sweaty
Fingers exploring
Let's get to work
Good morning
I'm sorry
Call me a cab
I can't
Stay
--
-
Copyright ©
Jyssvw22
... [
2014-06-20 17:43:03]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Jumping in the shower ...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Invierno on
Saturday, 21st June 2014 @ 07:39:57 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
powerful stuff here. Brought out a number of emotions in me. Also a few memories....the disgust...... My second wife was kissing me and I wanted to vomit...(poor her..not all her fault...another burden I carry).
I'm impressed and proud of you for not backing away from the distasteful; "Skin sweaty, Fingers exploring, Let's get to work". It's an icky image and makes me somewhat draw away in revulsion....well done. Not all images, thoughts, evocations emanating from a poem should be (IMHO) fuzzy and teddy bear cosy. Nasty, hard uncomfortable takeaways are important as well....it is the EVOCATION of emotion, not the type of emotion that defines a good poem. You have accomplished that here...well done.
Invierno |
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Re: Jumping in the shower ...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 21st June 2014 @ 08:48:12 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
wow... honesty! oh what is it this thing partners do when they are both aligned. how do you find it and how do you fend off the other...
especially trying to be kind.
I don't flex by the mirror naked much mind you... stopped that a while back.
Oh mercy be the lust of my love life. my love whom I do love no longer does she bite.
good writing!
Peace! |
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