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pupetteer
Contributed by
FireStarter
on
Monday, 7th September 2015 @ 04:20:07 PM in AEST
Topic:
DreamsandWishes
|
You've got your strings attached to my heart
If you untangle them, I'll be torn apart
You make me move of your own will
Don't place me up on the sill
I am the puppet on your hand
You help me walk, sit, or stand
You guide me with impeccable skill
And yet once your done, you place me up on the sill
You treat me like I'm breakable, yet Im not
This is not the life that I have sought
I want to move on my own
And not to hear anger in your tone
I want to be able to move my own strings
And want to hold tight the most precious of things
You..
Copyright ©
FireStarter
... [
2015-09-07 16:20:07]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: pupetteer
(User Rating: 1 )
by FireStarter on
Monday, 7th September 2015 @ 04:39:43 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Apologies, the title was supposed to say "puppeteer" |
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Re: pupetteer
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Monday, 7th September 2015 @ 04:45:52 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This poem gives me the idea that I put people on pedestals too much. I should be more realistic. There are a couple of places where the rhyming is forced otherwise this is well written
(see lines 8,9 and 14) |
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Re: pupetteer
(User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on
Monday, 7th September 2015 @ 10:03:54 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Again you're a very visual poet.
You're like watching TV but we have the pleasure of seeing it develop as we read.
Very well done and not easy to accomplish!
James |
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Re: pupetteer
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 10th September 2015 @ 09:46:17 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Very nicely done!! I've felt like a puppet many times Its a foul feeling isn't it!!?
Keep writing and sharing always!! Poets and poetry never die!!
Peace,
$tr8 $av 510 |
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