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The Disenchantment of the World
Contributed by
Contralogicus
on
Tuesday, 14th October 2003 @ 10:11:51 PM in AEST
Topic:
LoveRemembered
|
You disenchanted the world for me,
Making all of its elements plain to see.
You opened my eyes to the blindness of our days,
Showed me how to breathe in the smoke, see through the haze.
You impregnated me with questions I pondered in the dark,
Leaving upon me your cruelest mark.
You uncovered for me reality following painful reality,
Until I yearned for the days I lived in fantasy.
I would rather be the blind man groping for the meaning of living,
Than be the frightened man hiding in the caves of the missing.
I would rather turn my blind eyes to the sun and yield,
To the vaguest red against a darkened field.
Than squint and blink in the brightness of the rays,
Wondering what lies in the blindness of our days.
Copyright ©
Contralogicus
... [
2003-10-14 22:11:51]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Disenchantment of the World
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 15th October 2003 @ 09:37:50 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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*looks around shocked* why are there no comments? people have you gone nuts? this poem is so friggen beautiful it made my heart cry. I absolutely loved it, it is excellent. So emotional, so deep, so beautiful, so everything. You have put into words what so many people can only think. Amazing talent you have here.
-hugz- stacey |
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Re: The Disenchantment of the World
(User Rating: 1 )
by EternitysLyre on
Tuesday, 4th November 2003 @ 04:51:40 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Well, have you ever heard of "awe-stricken silence?" That about sums it up.
The content is beyond perfect, i agree. As a poem, though, i beleive it could have a bit more polish.
particularly this line:
"I would rather turn my blind eyes to the sun and yield,
To the vaguest red against a darkened field."
Nothing wrong with it, it's just that the syllables are so different in length that the connection of the rhyme actually hinders the flow of the poem rather than give it that poetic magic we all aim to acheive.
Your Amicably Cynical Einstein Wannabe,
~Kage Coronitis |
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