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A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
Contributed by
Yodo
on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 12:18:17 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
A day indeed what a day indeed
When I just don't want to write.
A day indeed what a day indeed
When nothing seems to go right.
I'm awake I am drowsy
I feel kind of pouty
And I wish you would all go away.
My head is still throbbing
My heart is still bobbing
And I want to take back what I said.
Love is elusive
Pain is intrusive
Emotions won't leave me alone
My life is still wasting
These words am I chasing
I don't think this rhyme's going to fit.
I'm tired of angst I am sick of defeat
Apathy Apathy I know is to laugh
Humanity is but a deam
And such are the things that we may call life
But I won't get into that song
Thus - I'll row down the stream.
Life is too real
It won't be lost
Despare would just be loosing
To pantomime this rhyme in time
to loose all sense of metre
I think I'll stop, you know the rest
I'll place my heart back in my chest.
Copyright ©
Yodo
... [
2003-10-22 00:18:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
(User Rating: 1 )
by JusMeOtay on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 12:33:00 AM AEST
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SHAWEEEET! Go Yodo!
Thats catchy ryhme you got going there. I'm liking the inbetween the lines stuff. Nice write! |
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Re: A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 12:34:53 AM AEST
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Good work here.
Hang tuff-n-keep writing!
This too soon shall pass!
peace, joy, luv,
emy |
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Re: A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
(User Rating: 1 )
by Yodo on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 01:06:21 AM AEST
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Hang tuff? Huh? No no no, I think you misread something. This is more of a poem that's there to be somewhat sarcastic, somewhat jovial. It's phillisophical in some respects, but I suppose it's just a look into my mind at a speciffic moment.
I really didn't have anything to write, so I just started writing. Hence, "Don't want to write", and some things haven't worked out right today, no big deal.
Certain things in my life, I wish I hadn't said, speciffically to certain people, but no matter.
Emotions don't stop, and that's both good and bad, but because I didn't have much to write, I coudln't think of any other place to go.
The angst and apathy thing was in part, because I'm sick of feeling that in myself, but I also don't like reading poems about it either.
The Humanity part is that Humanity is raw emotion, and that's experienced in life. It's REAL. But it's also fake in some ways, because we conjure up emotions on our own. Somewhat like this poem. The continuing verses are obviously refferences to Row Row Row Your Boat.
The next stanza is a truth that seems to be real. Despair is the loss of hope, and the negative side of humanity. Humanity is part of life, and in this poem somewhat equals life. Despair is the start of loosing humanity, and becoming apathetic. When you become truely apathetic, you've lost humanity, and thus lost life. Despair is loosing life.
The last stanza is my form of closure to the poem.
Done. |
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Re: A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
(User Rating: 1 )
by PoeticReign on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 02:37:14 AM AEST
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hehe... i'm likin' it, indeed :) love the 2nd stanza & love the closing 2 lines... reality with a splash of humor
~Nikki |
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Re: A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 07:30:08 AM AEST
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| A very good write. venkat |
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Re: A Day Indeed (Quoth the Raven)
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on
Wednesday, 22nd October 2003 @ 07:54:29 AM AEST
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| very good write... great explanation too. :) |
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