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Never said goodbye
Contributed by
irshprnss
on
Tuesday, 4th November 2003 @ 08:47:46 PM in AEST
Topic:
FriendshipPoetry
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I have to say I was suprised
To hear your voice again
I really thought you''d givin up
I''d lost you as a friend
I guess our frienship is as strong as I''d origanally believed
I guess their really is a bond between you and me
It really wasn''t easy to go on every day,
not knowing if you cared without a phone call to say
Now I sit back the weight on my sholders gone
knowing I have a friend with whom to move on
knowing for sure you''ll be by my side
Finally understanding why you never said good bye
Copyright ©
irshprnss
... [
2003-11-04 20:47:46]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Never said goodbye
(User Rating: 1 )
by Shmily on
Tuesday, 4th November 2003 @ 09:22:18 PM AEST
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This is a wonderful poem...absolutely beautiful. Keep 'em coming! :)
*K |
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Re: Never said goodbye
(User Rating: 1 )
by eternal_sorrows on
Thursday, 11th December 2003 @ 12:58:34 PM AEST
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I absolutly love this! It hit so close to hoome for me for I too have a friend like this. The ending was breathtaking!!
es |
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Re: Never said goodbye
(User Rating: 1 )
by EternitysLyre on
Tuesday, 23rd December 2003 @ 08:32:44 AM AEST
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If I recall correctly, many weeks ago you asked for a bit of commentary from me. Well, I'm sorry for the delay, and I'll do my best not to be a dick.
The poem itself hits home one on of the many laudable themes of life and friendships, and comes away with that warm, fuzzy feeling everyone appreciates. In that sense, it's an excellent poem; it's expression is as graceful as its emotion, and the wording within conveys such frank informality it seems quite fitting for conversation between two who have just been through hardship.
I'll not correct your spelling mistakes; just remember to give the poem a quick look when you finish. They reduce the scale and magic of the poem somewhat, and at times the poem's lines seem like they're better off organized in a different fashion. I read the poem and found it would be better at some points to combine two shorter lines and make one long one, as they flowed perfectly and needed no division.
Anyway, good poem.
"Spring and fall are best of all; one brings life while one enthralls.
One of life, one of calm, both are marked by tortured qualms.
Bring you fate or bring you fear, think again--your time is here."
~ Kage Coronitis, on education |
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