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The Sun
Contributed by
BoyWonder
on
Sunday, 23rd November 2003 @ 02:52:34 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I look into the sky.
And what do I see?
I crimson son looking down on me.
It heals my soul and refines my skin
Yet it burns within.
Copyright ©
BoyWonder
... [
2003-11-23 14:52:34]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Sun
(User Rating: 1 )
by ShadowDaughter on
Sunday, 23rd November 2003 @ 03:07:09 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Okay, being honest: I liked this. A little short, but nice and to te point with a great sort of rhythm to it: "it heals my soul and refines my skin". Quite well done, keep it up.
--Shadow |
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Re: The Sun
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jellybellyprincess on
Sunday, 23rd November 2003 @ 03:31:26 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Sincerely honest----
I really liked it. The ending trips you up, because you think one thing, and then-- boom -- you're caught a bit off guard with hurt that's within the beauty. It's true, things that seem so beautiful and good can be painful too....
I like the length, it works for such a subject because it keeps you wondering a bit... It's just enough to get your mind going.
Great job, and welcome to the site =)
God bless,
Jellybellyprincess
; ) |
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Re: The Sun
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 23rd November 2003 @ 04:31:21 PM AEST
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Very good work here!
I luv the sun!
peace, joy, luv,
emy |
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