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Thoughts from a Chair
Contributed by
norticus
on
Wednesday, 26th November 2003 @ 03:46:42 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
I remember the storm, as I thought all alone
She shivered in fear, as the sky wailed a grown
We watched the clouds beginning to whirl
She said, Stop! I'm a girl!
I remember that blessing from above
A gift from god, a gift of love
I remember the corn, sitting in my chair
Kisses so sweet, with my hand in her hair
Passion so strong, as we broke the law
Lost in our love, I didn't withdraw
I felt a blessing of only good
She smiled as she said, Knock on wood.
I remember the game, touchdown in the sky
That special day when I let myself cry
The love of my life, split at the seams
I watched in awe, as she gave me my dreams
As I stared at my daughter, I never felt so blessed
I held my sweet mama, with my child on her breast
I remember my hands, so ugly and gross
Palms like books and fingers like toes
Ellie and Twinkle and their fabulous verses
When people would stare, I'd just yell, Curses!
That she didn't run sooner was a blessing I guess
When I made her laugh I felt the best
And then I remember the rain
An empty house filled with pain
Waited and waited for the phone to ring
So I could beg you to come and remove the sting
Now I know I'm blessed for the time we had
A picture reminds me and makes me sad
I think of the future an unwritten verse
And I pray to god to lift my curse
So I reach out to my old best friend
Love once before and perhaps again,,,
jz
Copyright ©
norticus
... [
2003-11-26 15:46:42]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Thoughts from a Chair
(User Rating: 1 )
by ArdRi79 on
Saturday, 29th November 2003 @ 01:16:18 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I like your poems man this one is especially good it shows the harsh reality of mens lives, your imagery rules. |
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Re: Thoughts from a Chair
(User Rating: 1 )
by norticus on
Saturday, 29th November 2003 @ 02:12:15 PM AEST
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In case you're wondering what this is about, I've decided to take it verse for verse.
In verse one the storm is reference to the time I gave Miranda a ride home from work because the weather was bad. In the car we were listening to a Jane's Addiction song which has a line that says, "Stop I'm a girl" I figured that the storm was God coaxing us together.
The next verse talks about corn. That's where my daughter was conceived. I didn't withdraw and when I told her about that she said, "knock on wood."
The touchdown in the sky is in reference to Monday night football that was on the wall mounted TV set in the hospital room when my daughter was born. Dr. Henry was watching it while checking the dialation of the cervix.
Verse three talks about some of the characters that I made up to torment Miranda. Actually she laughed, but I imagine I was pretty annoying.
It was raining the day I came home from work and she was gone. We had a fight and my pride didn't allow me to call. I destroyed all the pictures of us in a rage.
The future I referred to was when I decided to put pride aside and tell her I loved her and wanted her home, but I waited too long. It never happened.
And that is the literal comparison to this poem that is of all of mine the most emotional.
norticus |
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Re: Thoughts from a Chair
(User Rating: 1 )
by a_bear on
Tuesday, 16th December 2003 @ 03:57:08 AM AEST
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It is my belief that any poetry that makes you think, or moves you in any way is good poetry. The meter and all that ...are for music as far as I'm concerned. Your story has questions that make me want to sit down with you and have a long chat. I was moved, I felt anger, pity, sadness...all kinds of emotion. I don't presume to tell anyone how to better their poetry..just whether or not I enjoyed reading it. There were parts that shocked me..the verse about breaking the law...but even being shocked evokes a feeling...Poets paint with words from the heart.
I Saw your painting very well. |
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