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In A Circle
Contributed by
Vitreous_Soul
on
Sunday, 28th December 2003 @ 01:14:30 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
There I sat in a group all alone
Like a dysfunctional family around a fire
There I was, another clone
Another fossil in this polluted mire
Was it fake or is it real
Am I encircled by mirrors and thoughts
Was it me or what I feel
Or an obsolete series of robots
I heard my anger screaming
Telling me I was a waste
Sadness was wandering and dreaming
Wishing to be stricken and erased
Jubilance was hiding in a corner
Tired of being the most neglected
In the middle I stood the mourner
The soul which had been infected
Love gave a disappointed stare
Transfixing the heart which I had broken
In tears I say it's not fair
But Love spits upon my apologetic token
So there I was, frozen in place
A living poem, bringing disharmony to the rhyme
Sitting alone in a circle of disgrace
Waiting for the end of time
Copyright ©
Vitreous_Soul
... [
2003-12-28 01:14:30]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: In A Circle
(User Rating: 1 )
by ShadowDaughter on
Sunday, 28th December 2003 @ 01:23:30 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Whoa, I love the idea of your different feelings with personalities and personifications of their own. A nice, fresh perspective that I greatly enjoyed/appreciated. Some of the rhymes don't lie quite flat, but that's just me being critical.
tomorrow and yesterday,
Nora |
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Re: In A Circle
(User Rating: 1 )
by MisterRight on
Sunday, 28th December 2003 @ 02:19:17 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I can somewhat relate to this write and was wondering if it may have been inspired by a drug induced expierence? If by chance I'm right, feel free to private message me, because I've been through it.
Curtis |
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Re: In A Circle
(User Rating: 1 )
by EmSal on
Sunday, 28th December 2003 @ 05:33:36 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I enjoyed this write. Thanks for sharing and take care.
Emma. |
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Re: In A Circle
(User Rating: 1 )
by blueheart on
Sunday, 28th December 2003 @ 08:57:27 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Awesome flow of words! |
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Re: In A Circle
(User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on
Sunday, 28th December 2003 @ 08:25:06 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Dear VS,
This one went over my head. I couldn't relate..but then I've never been in a situation like this either.....but the poem itself was great!
lovingcritters
ConSue |
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