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Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
Contributed by
ShadowDaughter
on
Monday, 16th February 2004 @ 01:35:29 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
worthless she feels almost cheaper than the forgeries of food which try only half-heartedly to keep her alive
could've sold her body could've sold her soul chose to sell her heart
wearily, the girl reaches into her threadbare sack for a faded, once-garish sign flamboyantly and shamelessly proclaiming
"TEARS, BOUGHT AND SOLD!"
as the sign makes its tawdry entrance, jeers and cruelty assail her making their ever-presence known from the mouths of her fellow peddlers
they watch, shaking their heads in disgust, as a woman approaches, first customer of the day, little older than the salesgirl herself with despondency etched in her frame
she sets a hollow vitreous sphere upon the tear-girl's tottering stand the girl expertly pours the contents of the crystalline snowglobe into a delicate vial whilst the woman mumbles, "I shed those tears for him I wasted them! --they're all yours now."
the girl thanks her, rings up the total, and pays the woman with as sincere a smile --not very-- as she can muster
a young man soon ambles up hoping fervently none will see him here he whispers quietly, "she died three weeks past she died, and I just can't cry. I want to buy some tears."
she doles out a portion of a single snowglobe's contents charges him, and watches him go
and so drags on wearily the day of trading in tears buy, die a little, sell, die more take a deep breath and repeat
her neighbors stare, with disapproval set in their faces yet involuntary fascination shining in bleary eyes (street-corner rubbernecking better than any car accident) none quite daring to ask the question on their collective lips: the purchase of tears-- what the price?
could've sold her body could've sold her soul chose to sell her heart
tears fill her eyes and she spares a moment to marvel at the irony
before swiping them furiously away to greet the next customer.
Copyright ©
ShadowDaughter
... [
2004-02-16 01:35:29] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by bobotheclown on
Monday, 16th February 2004 @ 01:54:11 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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this was odd but cool I liked it a lot. Had a nice feel to it. Very well done.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by Vitreous_Soul on
Monday, 16th February 2004 @ 02:34:27 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Wow, Nora! Dare I say, this revision and the previous one have been nothing short of jaw-dropping. The first had little to gripe about, but this...is flawless. Poetry at it's highest level.
Truly, with CEGTY's,
-Dan |
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Monday, 16th February 2004 @ 09:23:31 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Now THIS is poetry. |
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by Lionel on
Tuesday, 17th February 2004 @ 11:53:57 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Moving Very moving I'm impressed
Lionel
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by lil_angel on
Wednesday, 25th February 2004 @ 04:29:54 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Wow this is wonderful! |
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by STRaNGe_LiNDSeY on
Saturday, 3rd April 2004 @ 08:03:55 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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seeing as i have not seen the origional post, i cant say much about that...but this is absolutely gorgeous... i love the lines "could've sold her body
could've sold her soul
chose to sell her heart"
Lindsey
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by grip-wth-broken-fingers on
Sunday, 11th July 2004 @ 10:49:18 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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alot of feeling in this poem i like it
thought about careful and to write a good poem you need to thi9nk which i know is hard cos i hate thinking lol dont know about u but its reealy good quite sad but a excellent poem thank you *grip* comment on min eplease |
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Re: Tears, Bought and Sold-- Revised
(User Rating: 1 ) by Cynthia on
Sunday, 17th October 2004 @ 03:32:07 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Nora, you really know how to tell a wonderful story. Such a sad write though. *S* Cynthia |
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