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Stop
Contributed by
jade_elephant
on
Sunday, 4th April 2004 @ 01:06:28 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
Stop your stupid smiling, It will never get me back, Full of regret, yearning, pleading, unnerving A look of please forgive and forget. I have forgiven, I have forgotten, So please lay off my case. Thats not the problem. Ive had enough of the worry and dread Guilty thoughts of a day not spent With you. When its not my fault. Working my socks off when you find it so easy to control your whole life in one go. Im learning, and Im finding out the fun way. The loss of you opened new doors, Closing those that caused hurt, Closed myself to your hurt, Opened the fun. Sorry if you then felt pain, step into my shoes and walk my steps, Not so easy huh. I dont want love, I dont want this, A repeat of the past gone by, Promises that pledge too much and lies with too much appeal. So lets just keep this simple, Fun, Relaxed, No ties. Perhaps Im being selfish, but I need a change from this life. So take some notice of what I say, Im not a mannequin for your hopes, I wont just please your ego, however much it hurts. For I hurt, I ache; Im confused and unsure, Never meaning that Im venerable, Just that I need some space of my own. Stop. Let me go.
Copyright ©
jade_elephant
... [
2004-04-04 13:06:28] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Stop
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jellybellyprincess on
Sunday, 4th April 2004 @ 01:43:10 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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When you say "stop" and you go from a long line in the poem to just one word on a line, it's really dramatic. It adds well to the word and its meaning. Makes the stop abrupt and what not. Very well done with that.
Nice write =)
God bless,
Ellen |
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Re: Stop
(User Rating: 1 ) by dolly_dagger on
Tuesday, 6th April 2004 @ 01:41:43 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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fantastic writing. very eloquent my lil jade elephant (or milliphant perhaps?) : ) |
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