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Mountains and Valleys
Contributed by
TheSchroedmeister
on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 01:40:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
A friend
and I dug a hole
in my backyard
we used spades
and lifted dirt
in heaps
to make
our own little mountain
we dug for hours
while the sun beamed
we paid our tolls with
sweat
in silence we dug
till at last we were
done
I kissed the earth
on my hands and
knees
and cast
myself into our abyss
I asked him to bury me
Copyright ©
TheSchroedmeister
... [
2004-05-13 13:40:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by XxPerfectlySanexX on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 01:44:09 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Nice, I like the fact that its short and to the point.
And has a bit of confusion in too, very good.
Keep writing the good poems and take care!
PerfectlySanex |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by lil_angel on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 01:53:54 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| A really liked this write! Keep writting! |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by bernard on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 02:54:55 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Great Poem, I felt myself with you while you were digging.
bernard. |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 03:56:37 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Oh my, lol, this sounds exactly like something my two sons would have done when they were young. They did try to dig to China one time. Lost the dog for a few days!
Rita |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by Remy on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 04:38:38 PM AEST
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a Message)
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reads like life poetry to me... i like this one... ;0)
~Remy~ |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 13th May 2004 @ 05:00:12 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
Valley in the shadow of death?
Childlike, reminiscent, yet seemingly dark . . .
If this were in the nostalgic poetry section i'd forgo that notion, but otherwise - i'm intrigued. (as usual).
A worthwhile read. (as usual). |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by xSlashXPrettyXSkinx on
Saturday, 15th May 2004 @ 04:38:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I'm surprised I haven't come across your work, up until now. I've always seen you around, but for some reason just never got the chance to really come and read your poetry. But heck am I glad I did today. This is an awesome poem. In a sense it seems like everyone is digging themselves mountains and valleys...waiting! Great imagry, loved the style of writing. You have a true talent; you know life. You write life well. I am going to go take a look through your other poems now, I am VERY VERY intrigued.
Lindsey |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Tuesday, 18th May 2004 @ 01:53:19 PM AEST
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short and too the point. i love how it ended.
very well written. this is pure greatness.
well done.
Arden |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Wednesday, 19th May 2004 @ 10:36:27 PM AEST
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a Message)
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cool poem, and much fun lol, hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Mountains and Valleys
(User Rating: 1 )
by Twisterchaser on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 11:51:13 PM AEST
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a Message)
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What a delightful write, our life has lots of peaks and valleys, and end the same way. Thanks
Andy |
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