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Love's Splendors
Contributed by
boricuacd
on
Thursday, 27th May 2004 @ 05:03:19 PM in AEST
Topic:
StoryPoetry
|
A glance across the room, feelings of anticipation,
butterflies, hunger, and passion. They meet
and chatter a while. No thoughts
of the future, only thoughts of elation.
Masks are worn concealing faces.
They embrace, kiss, lust.
A ring is worn, plans are made, and
trouble brews. Anger rears it head. Thoughts
of what could be, and what should not.
Conversations of mistrust, stress, and disappointment.
Love breaks through, ceremonies are performed, the multitude weeps.
Life ensues, scuffles arise,
laughter, yelling, weeping marriage.
Time goes by, children are born, and nests are slowly emptied.
End approaches, fear takes over, denial abounds.
They turn and glance across the room, feelings of anticipation, butterflies, hunger, and passion. Each other, together, they have forever.
Smiles, happiness, joy, and laughter.
Copyright ©
boricuacd
... [
2004-05-27 17:03:19]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Love's Splendors
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Thursday, 27th May 2004 @ 06:09:12 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Nice write. It touches on all lifes pitches and throes .I enjoyed this one . Nice work
Whisper |
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Re: Love's Splendors
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 27th May 2004 @ 06:16:17 PM AEST
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Interesting take on relationships. I thought this may have made a better dark / sad write than a happy, lovely write, personally.
If you'd have them turn at the end and find those feelings gone and irretrievable, it would have tied in nicely with the last line on the previous stanza, which has an air of gloom about it.
Just my opinion, however - I am feeling a bit dark, today, and its still a well-prepared piece.
Keep writing. |
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Re: Love's Splendors
(User Rating: 1 )
by Broken_Skin on
Monday, 31st May 2004 @ 09:09:40 AM AEST
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I can relate to this, very much. you have a
talent not all have might i say :) i'm not sure
what it is, but i like it x |
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Re: Love's Splendors
(User Rating: 1 )
by oldernotwiser on
Tuesday, 1st June 2004 @ 08:41:07 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I'm pretty sure what it is --
and that it may not be revealed in this poem.
But the poem is better and I'm in a wicked mood. |
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