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A Web for an Empty Mind
Contributed by
jt
on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 01:48:14 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
She spins her web to catch a dream
To feed her empty mind
Where she'll retreat within herself
Where noone else will find
Her tucked away within herself
Her refuge from the pain
She watched herself fall down from grace
Wears her heart like a stain
The tears have gone, lost somewhere else
Another time and place
But if you look closely at her
Their paths still frame her face
Such a beautiful girl now gone
Shes riding out the storm
She found a place still safe and warm
Just like an autumn dawn
And as the leaves fall from the trees
Her tears return to eyes
Realises that she cant escape
And once again she cries
But tears of sorrow dont rain down
For instead, now in place
Tears of despair crying their song
Once again stain her face
Copyright ©
jt
... [
2004-05-28 01:48:14]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Web for an Empty Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by DreamWeaver on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 02:23:24 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| Awesome write ... five stars ... Jan |
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Re: A Web for an Empty Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 05:11:14 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I agree 5 satrs, this was brilliant :)
pixie xx |
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Re: A Web for an Empty Mind
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Friday, 28th May 2004 @ 06:25:28 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
Terrific poem here. A clever title (with a nice balance between subtlety and ambiguity) sets the stage for this very emotional piece. I am impressed with the strong and near-flawless rhythm displayed throughout--you definitely have some experience in the realm of poetry.
Excellent, awesome, and any other adjective you'd like to place here---all are well deserved.
Chained and thrown into the ocean,
-V.S. |
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