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Darker Days
Contributed by
mdmorash
on
Tuesday, 8th June 2004 @ 05:11:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
Falling farther than I thought,
Never learning whats been taught.
Begging for a quick goodbye,
Feeling now my soul untie.
Visions flailing, all of you.
Memries showing youre not true.
Searching for what I cant find,
To this world myself I bind.
Touch the darkness all around,
Here beneath the open ground.
To the sun I hope and pray,
Never seen the light of day.
What you took I cant replace,
All thats left I now misplace.
Is there nothing that Ive done,
That will not soon be undone?
Though I try I cant escape,
Lost within this battered cape.
Torn away by waves of pain,
Slowly slipping, am I sane?
Mocking eyes you hold me down,
Upon my head a jesters crown.
Falling for the words you say,
Losing all the games you play.
Beaten now I wander lost,
Nothing gained at such a cost.
No direction no restraint,
Stiffly mired in complaint.
Know this now I wont give up,
Though on my soul you tend to sup.
All the pain youve given me,
Opened up my eyes to see.
Now I know the really you,
All your lies have now come true.
Though I know I cant break free,
So the you will now be me.
Locked within this vicious realm,
Round and round to overwhelm.
Wheres the author to these plays?
Curtain call on darker days.
Michael David Morash
Copyright 2004
Copyright ©
mdmorash
... [
2004-06-08 17:11:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Darker Days
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 8th June 2004 @ 05:17:02 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I liked this work, and some of the language use is terrific. It started to feel a little like American Pie, where you wish it would end on one of it's many strong notes. I think it would improve if you shortened it up a bit.
American Pie is a classic however, so this is just a humble opinoin.
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Re: Darker Days
(User Rating: 1 )
by Living_In_My_Dream on
Tuesday, 8th June 2004 @ 05:24:02 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I think this was a powerful, emotional, wrote filled with suck great strong feeling...I enjoyed it very mcu so...lol I loved it...great write keep it up keep it coming...
read and comment my stuff if you want...I'd love to hear what you think...if you want...
much love,
Dani |
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Re: Darker Days
(User Rating: 1 )
by eatfresh22 on
Tuesday, 8th June 2004 @ 05:37:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Wow! That was great. Great flow! Sad, and a little hopeless, but a good read nonetheless. I like your stuff.
~Carrie~ |
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