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MY DREAM
Contributed by
angelface
on
Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 01:31:38 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
...A Narrow Line Of Life And Fate Touched And Crossed.... ...Mentally Caged In Emotion Lost In My Own Thoughts... ...Death Crept In Shadows Forever It Seamed To Adore Me.... ...Finally It Absorbed My Body Now I Decide What lies Before Me..
((( My Fear ))) ~Lost Souls Shackled Upon Walls Colored With Blood ~Optics Open For Help..Yet Empty Completely Of Love ~Visualizing An Armory Of Skull Cross Bones And Blades ~With Skies Watching Down With hate Scaping Landz Ablaze ~Craters..Rocks...BrokenHearts,That Struggled And Strangled ~Into Pebbles Of Darkness Cornering A Field,Infested With Fallen Angles ~Surrounded n Flames Laying Below Dressed With Clipped Wings ~Demons Waiting To Feast On There Souls..Emerging From Scorchering Streams ~The Alignment Of Humanity And Sin Compromised Conduction ~No Authority...Satanic Chaos Slept In Sheets Of Destruction ~Following A Path That led To Satan Himself.... I Asked Him Shall This Be The Path I Take Up ~He Smelled With Teeth Of Sorrow And Demons As His Aura Of Make Up
((( My Greatest Fear ))) ~Was I To Wake In A Dark Coffin..In Barried Grounds Depth ~No Vision A Silent Environment Worms tearing My last pieces Of Flesh ~Thoughtless Heartless No End Nor Origin ~Boarded In...**Abyss**No Life I Could Breathe Threw An Organ ~This After Life Proved Pointless Maintaing Emotionally The Hardest......Eternal Darkness ~My Death Finally Awoke My Fears Peak... ~Identified Motionless...My Greatest Fear Eternal Sleep ~My Spirit Prayed Hungry For An Afterlife But Theres Nothing When You Die ~Death Is Death My Tears Shaping The Word Why
((( My Hope ))) ~Was I To Form Into A Fierce Eagle Dissolving In The Clouds ~Or Take Shape As A Wiser Being Not Human But Owl ~Or Voided Into Hopeless Noses Pictured As Drugs ~Or A Young Lion In My Mothers Paws Of Strength And Love ~ Reincarnation Threw A New Life Could Pose As Relief ~Yet Deep, In The Vowels Of my Mind It Did'nt Touch My Beliefs ~Learning Threw Christian Biblicals This Event Would Fail ~Yet Simultaneously Reincarnating Is A Better Comfort Than Hell
((( My Greatest Hope ))) ~I Felt Lost But Found Inside This Angelic World ~Swarms Of Angels Smiles Reflecting Light From Purls ~No Sin I Could Commit Inconscient Purified Was My Heart ~Bubbles Of Happiness Whistled From An Angles Harp ~This Beautiful Plain As Great As A Diamond An Amazing Site ~Spiritually Delighted Pacing Towards The Light ~Prospering Along This Cloudy Pathway Strange And Odd ~I Saw A Thrown...Finally I Was In The Presence Of God ~Is This The One That Unpossed the Possed But Demons Hosting To A Halt ~The Almighty Lord Born Below Mountain Olive Near The Seas of Sault ~Healed The Paralyzed Created Wine From Water ~Yes He Spoke And This Isn't Your Thoughts Your With Your Father ~My Soul mind And Heart Were reattached ~With A Sigh Of Relief And Two Wings Sprouting From My Back ~Rising Before The Heavenly Skies,Clouds That Were Soaked ~Pouring The Rains Comfort Liquidating Heaven My Greatest Hope
Copyright ©
angelface
... [
2004-06-11 13:31:38] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: MY DREAM
(User Rating: 1 ) by apollo on
Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 01:39:54 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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this was simply amazing. i can not tell you how much i enjoyed reading this. i could not turn away. this was one of the most crazy poems ihave read (in a good way though) this was purely amazing. i can not say enough but thank you for letting me read this fine work..
brandon |
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Re: MY DREAM
(User Rating: 1 ) by Princesaazul16 on
Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 01:49:15 PM AEST (User
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Beautiful. You put this amazing picture in my mind. You did a really good job with this poem. I loved it. Keep up the good work. I hope to hear more.
~Stace~ |
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Re: MY DREAM
(User Rating: 1 ) by Archie on
Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 02:11:36 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I like the last stanza of this poem very much. |
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Re: MY DREAM
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 23rd June 2004 @ 09:23:42 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Thanks for your comments on my poems. Its taken me a while, but I've come round to review some of your work. You said before in one comment that your spelling and rhyme was your worst parts of writing, and I can see that you struggle with some words, such as 'throne' being 'thrown' amongst others - yet this is a superficial consideration - you may be dyslexic for all I know. Try releasing the capitalisation of your Every Word, as the study it takes to maintain this consistency would be better employed to read over your writing carefully for any spelling mistakes.
Anyway - I've said enough about spelling. Your poem is one of the most descriptive and energetic dream poems I've read yet. It fits more into the 'inspirational category' for me, but that's another aside.
Heaven and Hell, or purgatory is a difficult subject to tackle, and you ploughed on through it with bravery. I admire that fighting spirit employed through your greatest fear to your greatest hope. It was an encouraging and insightful read, so thankyou for sharing it, angelface.
I will continue my commentary in due course, over some of your earlier works.
Good day. |
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