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Standing In a Hole...
Contributed by
pyrofungus
on
Wednesday, 30th June 2004 @ 11:29:27 AM in AEST
Topic:
NaturePoetry
|
Standing in a hole
Starring at the sky
Watching the clouds moving by
The trees started swaying
The birds had no balance
The wind kicked up
And broke a branch
Leaves fell from the branches
And covered the dirt below
A naked tree
The branches were bare
The wind was whistling
Tears spilled from the sky
Making unmistakable puddles in the dirt
The hole was filling with water
It came up to my waist
I stood there for days
Amazed at the sight
Taking in the precious world
The life on earth that could be sent away
And buried forever.
Copyright ©
pyrofungus
... [
2004-06-30 11:29:27]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Standing In a Hole...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 9th July 2004 @ 10:20:25 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I like the word usage here. It made me think of a storm about to erupt, as you drown in the puddles left by life.
Nice job here.
Angel always...godspeed...joni |
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Re: Standing In a Hole...
(User Rating: 1 )
by a_bear on
Thursday, 26th August 2004 @ 10:00:37 AM AEST
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| Very discriptive..allowing the reader to see...great. |
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Re: Standing In a Hole...
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 27th August 2004 @ 01:40:27 AM AEST
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Very nice images, I like that in your work. I hope you continue to grow with your poetry. I enjoy reading it, it's very raw, yet still vage enought to let the reader imagine. Nicely done.
P.K.W.L.
-E. Raven |
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