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Mea Culpa
Contributed by
inertia
on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 01:03:26 AM in AEST
Topic:
SongLyrics
|
i know,
i could take a little less
but i know,
you could give a little more
i know,
i'm always wrong
but i know,
you're never right
what can grow?
bring beauty with no light
i'm stepping on these cracks
stepping on these cracks
in your concrete garden
stepping on these cracks
stepping on these cracks
i know you're broken
i don't care anymore
rid me,
cleanse me,
smash my face on the concrete
i just don't care anymore
Copyright ©
inertia
... [
2004-07-14 01:03:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Mea Culpa
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 01:19:49 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I like this an awful lot! And... I think I recognize the feeling. You've expressed it perfectly. This is wonderfully blunt. Perfectly so. To clutter this up with unnecessary words would have been a mistake. From where I'm sitting - I think you nailed it!
Thanks for sharing this! I really enjoyed reading it and hope the feeling doesn't linger.
SNM |
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Re: Mea Culpa
(User Rating: 1 )
by Avarice_Riot on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 01:27:42 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
| Excellent! There's a very good rhythm here from start to finish, I'd love to hear this put to music. Great piece! |
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Re: Mea Culpa
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 04:08:09 AM AEST
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a Message)
|
| A very sad poem and seemingly apathetic |
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Re: Mea Culpa
(User Rating: 1 )
by Asatru on
Wednesday, 14th July 2004 @ 07:29:12 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Yes, this was very well written and had a great flow throughout it. I congradulate you. Keep writing. |
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