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Mi bonita, mi amor
Contributed by
Black13
on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 10:32:22 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
I tried so many times
to tell you hello.
Even dreamt about
how I know you can dance.
Eyes shimmer in candle light
voice singing like stars at night.
And all I know is
you stop my heart breathless
whenever you walk by.
If you were to take
my hand
I know it
would be just right.
Copyright ©
Black13
... [
2004-07-21 10:32:22]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 10:37:38 AM AEST
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So different for you! And I LOVE the brevity. This takes everything involved in the possibility of love and wraps it up in one succinct and very full fantasy. Oh, this is one of my favorites of yours. Both light and deep at the same time.
Stitch
(who loves a short write that is soooo complete) |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 10:52:34 AM AEST
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wow... this doesn't sound like you...
but it's gorgeous... and SNM is right...
so complete... awesome! |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by BrandySwanson on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 10:54:24 AM AEST
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this is really an excellent poem great job.
Brandy
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Terry on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 10:59:17 AM AEST
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| I liked this poem very much as the words showed a descriptive color that is beautiful. The romance in this poem shows a close relationship between a man and a woman. Keep writing poems like this! |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 11:06:37 AM AEST
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This is very nice! I like its flow, and such meaning in so few words. You should try more of these! :-)
Angel always...joni |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 12:43:28 PM AEST
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great write,
pixie xx |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 01:18:06 PM AEST
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I really liked this- for someone who doesn't believe in love, you have an amazing ability to express passion.
And all I know is
you stop my heart breathless
whenever you walk by.
That says so much to me -
nice job. |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 02:48:29 PM AEST
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This is very nice, Jeff. I agree that you should try more like this. Sounds like someone is infatuated with a young lady. Glad to hear it.
Rita |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 05:38:20 PM AEST
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It feels complete to me; I see no reason to add anything to this piece, as it is quite good. Very touching, emotive, expressive and meaningful. Great job, i'm glad you decided to post it.
Spontaneously combusted,
-V.S. |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Wednesday, 21st July 2004 @ 09:45:37 PM AEST
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Whoa! Vivid, and I think you expressed just the feeling. I know that feeling well. Damn it, too well.
Anyway, hope on. Excellent piece here in every respect. You can use a very tender style.
Andrew |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Monday, 26th July 2004 @ 01:38:50 PM AEST
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Wow Jeff.
And isn't this different?
Such a sweet little poem and i agree with everyone else: Excellently written.
The feeling is nice but not nice at the same time isn't it?
You should definatly write this way more often. You write well.
Sorry about the shoddy comment.
*hugs* Phil xxx |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by MoonlitAngel on
Tuesday, 27th July 2004 @ 05:42:12 PM AEST
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*is jealous*
Boy, that jealousy's sure going around like the plague lately. Arg... I dunno what to say. Hope to talk to you soon.
~ Dee |
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Re: Mi bonita, mi amor
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 20th March 2006 @ 10:40:41 AM AEST
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incomplete.. feels just right
warmly expressed Jeff |
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