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Walk a Little Staighter
Contributed by
Stew
on
Sunday, 1st August 2004 @ 10:51:12 PM in AEST
Topic:
toughstuff
|
Can you walk a little straighter, Daddy?
You're swaying from side to side.
Can you walk a little straighter, Daddy?
You're leading me.
I need you, don't you know?
But you're never, ever home.
This is why I need you,
This is why I am writing this poem.
Can you walk a little straighter, Daddy?
You never listen to what I have to say.
And when we do something together, Daddy,
You always seem to have your way.
I cannot understand
Why you do those bad things
You know they just hurt you, Daddy
'Cause the more you hurt yourself, the more you're hurting me.
Can you walk a little straighter, Daddy?
Because you know I love you so.
Can you walk a little straighter, Daddy?
You're leading me.
Copyright ©
Stew
... [
2004-08-01 22:51:12]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Walk a Little Staighter
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 1st August 2004 @ 11:18:06 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I can certainly relate to this as my kids father is a recovering alcholic. I divorced him when my children were young and raised them alone with out any help from him.
I'm sorry u have to go thru this.
Sad but awesome writing.
luv, huggs,
emy |
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Re: Walk a Little Staighter
(User Rating: 1 )
by MLCstar on
Sunday, 1st August 2004 @ 11:42:46 PM AEST
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| I like your use of repetition and your innocent prospective. Again, well done. |
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Re: Walk a Little Staighter
(User Rating: 1 )
by Alina on
Monday, 2nd August 2004 @ 05:44:21 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Great write. You recently read my poem titled "MOMMY" and asked for me to read your poems, so... here I am reading and commenting. I love this poem and I understand how it is because my mother is an alcoholic. It gets tough, but I've learned from her examples to not be the way she is when I have children. keep your head held high always, and turn your expiriences now into good lessons for the future. |
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Re: Walk a Little Staighter
(User Rating: 1 )
by savedbydeath on
Monday, 2nd August 2004 @ 05:45:41 PM AEST
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i can relate,kinda,my dad is 2 an alcoholic but i moved away from him when he started to hurt me physically,its a good thing that hes not at home when hes drinking but its not a good thing that he drinks,i really hope u have something against drinking so u don't end up drinking urself when u get older,i really like this poem keep up the good work and i hope ur dad quits drinking not just 4 u but his self 2,take care
savedbydeath |
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Re: Walk a Little Staighter
(User Rating: 1 )
by waos on
Thursday, 5th August 2004 @ 11:31:59 PM AEST
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| That's really really good. So innocent sounding and it rings so true, that those of us who are leading all need to "walk a little straighter" because we never know who we are guiding off of the path. Wow, that's a really good poem there because it really gets a person thinking. Very good job. |
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Re: Walk a Little Staighter
(User Rating: 1 )
by grip-wth-broken-fingers on
Saturday, 7th August 2004 @ 04:41:18 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| sad but intreguing xgripx |
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