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Our world
Contributed by
badboyzlover
on
Monday, 2nd August 2004 @ 03:02:43 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
A little boat sways back and forth,
On the waves, that holds my pain.
I sit here in the middle,
Wallowing in self-pity.
But I look through my wave,
All I see is you.
Only you could bring me out,
Just one word from you,
Just one look,
Brings me out to the world I made.
For just you and me.
But when you go away,
You leave me alone again,
And I go right back to my wave,
I go right back to the real world,
I go back to dying.
Copyright ©
badboyzlover
... [
2004-08-02 15:02:43]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Our world
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Monday, 2nd August 2004 @ 03:23:00 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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I loved the concept of the boat and the waves but I thought you could have expanded the use of that metaphor.
(Just my thoughts...maybe because I love the sea so much)... But it was an enjoyable read... Thank you...
Jenni |
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