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Stand and Watch
Contributed by
hurthurthurt
on
Wednesday, 4th August 2004 @ 12:18:02 AM in AEST
Topic:
AngryPoetry
|
Put the bullet in my brain.
Slice the knife across my vein.
Around my neck, please pull the rope.
Fill me with the pills to dope.
Throw me from the window high.
Stand there, please; and watch me die.
With no emotion, watch me scream.
Stand there please, and crush my dreams.
Watch the shadow drown my smile.
Stand there, please; and watch a while.
Please will you rob me of my pride;
And kill me if I try to hide?
Laugh at every tear I cry.
Stand there, please; and watch me die.
Please stand there watching as I die...
Copyright ©
hurthurthurt
... [
2004-08-04 00:18:02]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Stand and Watch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stew on
Wednesday, 4th August 2004 @ 12:24:04 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| your poetry is so sad, it makes me want to cry. i hope this isn't what you really feel. however, excellent write. |
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Re: Stand and Watch
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 4th August 2004 @ 02:23:35 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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As your name suggests, there'd be a lot of emotion caught up in your work. I found this powerfully evocative, where your rhyme captured the frustration of existence so well.
I also enjoyed the repetition over the final two lines.
Well done and welcome. |
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