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Sailors Trunk
Contributed by
artostuff
on
Tuesday, 24th August 2004 @ 04:19:17 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
I am but a emblem on a
sailors trunk, tied down
to an envious grave, with a
length of hemp by corrupted
hands, whos scared lines lied
through it all, these here on
the severed wrist say how
long I'll suffer clinging on
to fools gold, perhaps to
sever my master hand was
error, twas far better to gelatine
his head and devour this
body whole, a renaissance
trap, nothing more, alas,
I am at a place I've made
home I call it distress, so
far below from sparkling
salvation, if only it stood
still, is it my folly, I so
deluded tied down to a
sailors trunk.
Copyright ©
artostuff
... [
2004-08-24 04:19:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sailors Trunk
(User Rating: 1 )
by MsScissors on
Tuesday, 24th August 2004 @ 06:08:35 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Your poem reads like it came unobstructed from your heart.
that is the well-spring from which all good poetry flows.
Your desperation and saddness are clearly expressed without awkwardness.
Lovely, and terrible. |
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Re: Sailors Trunk
(User Rating: 1 )
by skyblumoon on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 10:29:17 AM AEST
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What sadness envolpes you my dear. I can tell that this was truely heart felt.
Blu
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Re: Sailors Trunk
(User Rating: 1 )
by buchi on
Monday, 18th October 2004 @ 04:16:52 PM AEST
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This poem is well conceived and executed and has antithetical force without effort or flippancy. The final thought has also a high ideal message.
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