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Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
Contributed by
Hurretje
on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 03:02:42 AM in AEST
Topic:
SecretLove
|
(Version 1)
You are like
Bryce Dallas Howard on screen
And Barry White in dolby surround
I drown as I dive in the sinks of your eyes and
Burn as I let your dark voice engulf me
But your looks are not meant for me
And in your embrace I don't feel your heart
*
(Version 2)
You are like
Bryce Dallas Howard on Hollywood screen
And great Barry White on a discotheque scene
I drown as I dive in the blue of your eyes
I burn each time your dark voice buries my cries
But none of these sweet looks are meant just for me
And your warm embrace breaths no sincerity
*
Copyright ©
Hurretje
... [
2004-09-09 03:02:42]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 03:06:19 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Welcome back, Hur - t's been a while.
I appreciate the variation in this theme - its subtle and well-worded, although I'm unaware of whom Bryce Dallace Howard is . . . but anyway - I like this line;
"And in your embrace I don't feel your heart "
Its well-written. I find darkness and depth within the words.
Keep writing. |
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 05:35:03 AM AEST
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a Message)
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welcome back Hur :)
great write,
pixie xx |
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 06:18:59 AM AEST
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welcome back! i wll be honest i don't know who Bruce Dallas Howard is but this is very well written as usual.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 08:14:24 AM AEST
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Well, I don't know who Bryce is either, lol. This is an emotional piece. It is about time you got back. I have missed you.
Rita |
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 08:28:21 AM AEST
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I am captivated by version two..
wonderfully done.
welcome my dear friend.:-) venkat |
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Thursday, 9th September 2004 @ 08:32:53 AM AEST
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Glad you're back Hur.
I was wondering where you had dissapeared to. lol
I adore the second version also. And i also don't know who Bryce Dallas Howard is either. (Sorry. lol)
"I drown as I dive in the blue of your eyes
I burn each time your dark voice buries my cries"
That is my favourite part.
Great write,
Welcome back,
Phil xxx
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Re: Silent Reproach to an Unattainable Love
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 08:55:47 AM AEST
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a Message)
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:) glad to have you back.
this was very interesting. i really liked how it was written. and the bit of darkness mixxed in.
really awesome poem. i liked it. great job. keep it up. 5 stars
Arden |
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