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A Finer Failure
Contributed by
remy
on
Thursday, 30th September 2004 @ 10:45:01 AM in AEST
Topic:
DreamsandWishes
|
well could it just be one thing
instead of pulling on my heart strings
i've been held under a crush
no, it isn't much...
but it's nothing that i wanted
well i couldn't even if i stopped it
just forget i said anything at all
i'm waiting for your call
well kept well except i won't accept it
no regrets and sure i could expect that
this isn't repetition like before
the class is closed no room for more
what's this thing i've created?
couldn't tell even with reiterations
one more thing pressed under thumb
and yes i'm feeling dumb
it's true
i've been waiting for you
i'm through
oh if only you knew
black-handed yes you caught me
now see what time has brought me?
a steady profession encased in confession
so i failed the lesson...
stumble then on my words repeated
fumble my hands on days depleted
well i guess i'm done for now
kick me to come down
well spent but again i could relent this
just a touch of my forgetfulness
spendless with nothing to speak for
helpless with everything to reach more
more or less kissing air to vein appeal
call it well there's no care you can steal
no this time i couldn't be wrong
so sing the stupid song
it's true
i've been waiting for you
i'm through
oh if only you knew
and soon
i'll be...
no.
i won't.
Copyright ©
remy
... [
2004-09-30 10:45:01]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: A Finer Failure
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Thursday, 30th September 2004 @ 11:14:10 AM AEST
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a Message)
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an intresting write, touched with sadness *hugs*
takecare
pixie xx |
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Re: A Finer Failure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Archie on
Thursday, 30th September 2004 @ 02:40:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This reminds me of a song
"Yes I'm sutting right here
waiting for you my dear
wondering if you're ever gonna show
Well my darling I have to go
Neverthe less I say
You got me wating"
"Sitting in the park" is the song. Great write! |
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Re: A Finer Failure
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadreckoning1983 on
Sunday, 3rd October 2004 @ 12:51:22 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| this was very good remy, i think i know what it's about, maybe. you are a very good writer. sorry i took so long to comment back on you, you read the moth, thanks for commenting, you have found a new fan. |
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Re: A Finer Failure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Daniela_Maria_Violin on
Sunday, 3rd October 2004 @ 02:36:11 PM AEST
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a Message)
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"are you gonna comment on it, now that we spent 15 minutes arguing?" lol....
awesome write by the way.... :) |
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Re: A Finer Failure
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 6th February 2005 @ 02:32:05 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I really liked this one, it holds alot of meaning. I enjoy reading poems that the poet puts themselves into, their feelings and every thought Good job Remy, keep it up. |
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