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one last breath
Contributed by
Dizza_13
on
Tuesday, 5th October 2004 @ 04:00:01 AM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
Come to me please I think Im falling,
Listen please my soul is calling,
I yelled out before the thunder,
Did you ever wonder,
What we could have been,
Things arent always as they seem.
Touch my soul,
Hold me now,
Im falling down a crack,
What is it that I lack,
Back on the road to nowhere,
Looks like no one ever did care.
My heart is aching,
I cant find the way,
My soul is breaking,
I thought I was on the right path but I must have gone astray.
I cried out for you to save me,
The way ahead looks murky,
As if its leading to my death,
And Im down to my last breath,
And with it let me say.
Hold me now,
Ive fallen down for the last time,
Down a wall I could never climb,
Finally you can hear my voice,
I was in love with you.
Copyright ©
Dizza_13
... [
2004-10-05 04:00:01]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: one last breath
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kindredblood_dragon on
Tuesday, 5th October 2004 @ 04:21:05 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This so sensitivily written Dizza, and with such heartfelt feelings, you have catured the essence of what you are feeling and put it into words I can understand, creating such a vivid picture.
I hope you find what it is you seek, enabling you climb that impossble wall, and find the love you wish for so much. |
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Re: one last breath
(User Rating: 1 )
by corrupted_minds on
Tuesday, 5th October 2004 @ 04:36:25 AM AEST
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| Beautiful Dizza, always nicely written. |
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Re: one last breath
(User Rating: 1 )
by Yousef on
Tuesday, 5th October 2004 @ 06:49:41 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Nice poem an well written too, I really liked the line that says "I cried out for you to save me", that's a very powerful line, keep it up. |
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Re: one last breath
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spazzo on
Wednesday, 6th October 2004 @ 10:01:29 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very Great write. |
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